doubleplusundead

May 19, 2008

dewmocracy has failed

Anyone familiar with the DEWmocracy ad campaign? It was an ad campaign that allowed you to choose flavors for a new Mountain Dew soda, vote and campaign for your flavor of choice. There are three new flavors, and the winner of those three in the next vote will unveiled as the latest Mountain Dew product. Mountain Dew and Pepsi have long been trying to branch out beyond the original Mountain Dew with limited success, and after my taste test, I feel confident in saying they won't have any success here either.

I saw three new sodas, I bought three new sodas, I figure I gotta try them, right? So I bought three 20 oz. bottles.

I opened the first of these sodas, the Mountain Dew Revolution. Like Ron Paul's rEVOLution, Mountain Dew's Revolution is total crap, like Ron Paul's nasty mix of crazy conspiracy theorist and crazy paleocon crank, the Mountain Dew Revolution is a nasty mix of crappy berry-ish candy tasting badness with a nastier back note of cough syrup. You'd have to be insane to like this crap, and even more insane to vote for it.

Yeah, okay, my review of the Revolution is bad, but not nearly as bad as the soda itself. The only way I can see this appealing to anyone is if they've developed a taste for the purple stuff and want that wonderful cough syrup flavor in a drink that won't make you high or kill you.

Next I tried the Mountain Dew Supernova. If its a Supernova, its a supernova of cheap candy flavor. You know when you were a little kid, and you'd go out on Halloween and get candy that was like the crappy generic version of Runts? They didn't have the fun shapes, they had kind of a chalky flavor and a really cheap tasting flavoring, and when you ate a bunch of them they kind of melded into an unappealing vaguely fruity flavor? Yeah, its basically like a carbonated swig of that flavor.

Last I tried the Mountain Dew Voltage. To me, this basically tasted like Pepsi Blue, minus the aggressive cough syrup taste of Pepsi Blue. It basically tasted like a soda version of every crappy blue-raspberry flavored thing in the world, so it was just a typical bad soda, which means I found it to be the least offensive of the three.

So they were all bad, but certainly not as bad as some other ones I've tried in the past, like Canada Dry Green Tea soda and Pepsi Jazz Caramel, the latter of which is about the nastiest carbonated beverage ever created. I'll stick with Frozen Run.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 10:36 PM | Comments (17) | Add Comment
Post contains 445 words, total size 3 kb.

Oh, man, I LOVE cough syrup with codeine. Makes me high as a kite. Until recently, you could still get it without a scrip in the UK, if you coughed pitifully enough for the pharmacist. I got *lots* of colds over there (koff, koff.)

Posted by: S. Weasel at May 20, 2008 07:52 AM (rasT+)

2 I thought Code Red was decent...

Posted by: Joseph at May 20, 2008 10:20 AM (ni/US)

3 Code Red, that dark grape stuff and the orange one were okay, the rest were crap.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at May 20, 2008 11:01 AM (ZuzXA)

4 Mountain Dew, to go by its advertising, aims at older teens. The ones who have graduated from candy to cheap beer. They have yet to encounter the concept "beer that tastes good". They have yet to develop what oenophiles (that is to say, snobby winos) call "palette". So Mountain Dew formulates its products to taste accordingly.
So why be surprised that they taste like what they taste like?

Posted by: kishnevi at May 20, 2008 12:38 PM (406FR)

5 True, but I would have thought they were gross when I was a dumb teenager too.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at May 20, 2008 12:41 PM (ZuzXA)

nasty mix of crappy berry-ish candy tasting badness with a nastier back note of cough syrup

Don't tell anyone but that's the secret ingredient of a Flaming Veeshir.

Posted by: Veeshir at May 20, 2008 01:18 PM (zXUuJ)

7 Has the Wildey come in yet?

Posted by: doubleplusundead at May 20, 2008 01:21 PM (ZuzXA)

8 Why, oh why do they have to fuck with the Not-Quite-Official drink of No Runny Eggs? Give me the original or give me Val-U-Rite!

Posted by: steveegg at May 20, 2008 09:10 PM (LvEFt)

9 They aren't changing the original, this is an attempt to make a new flavor.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at May 20, 2008 09:15 PM (ZuzXA)

10 They reached perfection with the original. Why change?

Although, I have to agree: Code Red is pretty damned good, too.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at May 21, 2008 12:56 AM (uKe6F)

Has the Wildey come in yet? No it hasn't and it's driving me freaking nuts. When I ordered it I was expecting 1 month (as per their website), so I ordered it in mid-March to have it for BAG-Day. They said it would take 2 weeks. Now, it's been 2 months.

I was watching Firefly the other day, at the beginning of "The Train Job" they get into a fight in a bar. One guy pulls a pistol on them and Jayne says, "Them ain't kosher rules" or something, the pistol is a Wildey.

Posted by: Veeshir at May 21, 2008 09:34 AM (zXUuJ)

12 That sucks ass, what could be taking so damn long? I know how much those cost too, I'd think they'd be prompt about getting such a damned expensive pistol to their customer...I would be.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at May 21, 2008 10:09 AM (ZuzXA)

I have no idea what's taking so long, I don't want to bug the guys at the gun store (I ordered it through them), but it's really getting annoying. And the worst part is that they told me it would be early and now it's very late.

Posted by: Veeshir at May 21, 2008 10:55 AM (ThMnZ)

Okay, I called the gun store to get him to find out what the deal is. They said, "Two weeks". I think they're the guys who redid Walter Feilding's house.

Bernie, at VA. Arms, told me they said something about free magazines, which would be nice, but he got on their case about getting the freaking gun to me. He also said that they denied that they had said "3 weeks" and he said he was a little rude but not too much. He told them that saying "two weeks" for over two months is unacceptable.

They're going to check how long really and call him back and he's going to call me back later on today.

Posted by: Veeshir at May 21, 2008 11:09 AM (ThMnZ)

15 Well, hopefully you get some freebies out of this...

Posted by: doubleplusundead at May 21, 2008 12:01 PM (ZuzXA)

Bernie at Va Arms never called back, hopefully he will today.

So at best, I'm still 2 freaking weeks plus shipping time from getting my Wildey. If I had a blog, they would be rueing the day they took close to 3 months to get me my Wildey. I'm seriously close to telling Bernie to tell them if it's not in 2 weeks to forget it, I'll just get the M1919 (I'd try to find one in .30-06 if I can but .308 is still a fine, and cheaper, cartridge).

I don't really like it when I get free stuff because someone messed up, I prefer they don't mess up. But, since it has taken so damn long I should get at least a free cleaning kit and an extra mag.

And... it's getting harder and harder to keep $2k just laying around.

Posted by: Veeshir at May 22, 2008 09:02 AM (zXUuJ)

17 True, I'd rather they just get shit right the first time. As for the 1919, .308 would probably be a hell of a lot cheaper to feed. And that thing is gonna chew through a hell of a lot of ammunition.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at May 22, 2008 10:29 AM (ZuzXA)

Hide Comments | Add Comment