August 29, 2008
I think I speak for everyone when I say, "Yowza!*"
Update: This is simply the most exciting political news I've had in my lifetime! She's PERFECT. Her inexperience is something to be noted but it is countered by the fact that she is the only person with ANY EXECUTIVE EXPERIENCE RUNNING!
She gives me a tingle up my leg.
* - For a politician and a mother of five, she's smokin' and you know it.
Exit question: If it is Palin, and we find out for sure before Tuesday, Vintage is on vacation, does he drop in to make a celebratory post or does his head just asplode from sheer awesomeness because of the combination of having Palin as VP while being on vacation?
August 28, 2008
Drinkers in Stirling are being warned to be on the lookout for fake vodka containing potentially harmful levels of methanol.So, if you see some guy (or "bloke") selling vodka out of the back of his van, you should probably pass, no matter how good the bargain is. Come to think of it, that's generally sound advice when it comes to people selling anything out of the back of a van.
Trading standards officers in the city are hoping to raise awareness after counterfeit bottles of Spar Imperial vodka were found in shops in England.
Fears are being raised that the fake vodka may be making its way north.Experts have warned the high levels of methanol in the bottles can cause serious illnesses and blindness.
Brian Wilson, trading standards officer with Stirling Council, said: "It should be noted that no counterfeit bottles have been found in Spar stores and there are no concerns associated with authentic bottles of Spar Imperial Vodka.
The organisation warned that the only legitimate route of purchase for Spar Own Label 70cl is via a Spar store and that any Spar vodka offered for sale via any other means should be deemed suspect.
With more than two years of meticulous planning under their belts, organizers of the Republican National Convention are warily watching Tropical Storm Gustav to see if it turns into a hurricane and slams into the Gulf Coast.
As the storm gained momentum Thursday off the coast of Jamaica, it was headed on a trajectory toward New Orleans, which was hit three years ago today by Hurricane Katrina. If it strikes the Gulf Coast on Monday, that would coincide with the first day of the GOP convention at the Xcel Energy Center in St. Paul.
that happen, I'd imagine the tiresome but inevitable "John McCain
doesn't care about black people" line would be trotted out
lickety-split. I hope Ray Nagin has those school buses gassed up and
ready to go this time.
These goofy "so scary that" promotionals and ads are ridiculous, but my favorite of these promotionals is for The Screaming Skull (which was featured on MST3K, you can see the corny promotional after the Gumby short, or skip to 6:00, but the Gumby bit was funneh),
A giant sixty-foot pyramid is constructed at midfield, and when the time for the speech comes the upper section tilts backwards to reveal Obama inside, who then gives a stirring speech to those assembled about how he will work to "erase George Bush's name from the history books."
Although volunteers were available for the labor, this was still abandoned as too expensive.
Half of the Titanic
Obama gives his speech from the deck of half of the Titanic, sticking up out of the midfield turf as if it is sinking. The theme for the speech is "Righting the Ship of State" and focuses on how we'll recover from 8 years of Republican misrule. Leonardo DiCaprio is on board to introduce him by yelling "The next king of the world, Barack Obama!"
Rejected because some thought the image of Obama on a sinking ship would resonate poorly with voters.
Tree of Life
A three-hundred-foot-tall tree, akin to the one in Disney's Swiss Family Robinson exhibit, takes center stage, with Obama standing beneath it's branches talking about how important it is to live in harmony with all the peoples of the world as well as with nature, and how he would help us to "repair our grievous injury to the only planet we've got."
During construction of the graphite tree, a smelly hippie known only as Dumpster Pop-Tart climbed up in it and refused to leave until all windmills were turned off at night to protect bats. The project had to be abandoned because there is no known way to get a hippie out of a tree.
Christmas in Cambodia
Invesco field is turned into a steaming jungle, and Obama gives his speech from the deck of a patrol boat talking about how our military is turning young men and women into killing machines that commit acts of savagery not seen since the Franco-Prussian war. His speech centers on how the horrors of fighting in an unjust war affected him.
Nobody but John Kerry thought this was a good idea.
Obama stands in the middle of an urban wasteland and begins by yelling "who's the candidate?" with the crowd answering "sho'nuff!" Then, as he talks about his experience doing community development, the gritty cityscape is turned into an attractive urban scene with cafes, organic grocery stores, and schools with massive funding problems.
This set was constructed but seized by police as evidence after a Detroit stripper's body was dumped here, clad in nothing more than a washcloth monogrammed with "Mayor KK." Police have no suspects.
Class is in Session
Returning to his most familiar setting, a faux classroom is set up and Obama gives a lecture on the importance of good governance to the nation, with 80,000 students receiving a PhD in Obamaology when he's finished.
Idea abandoned after Joe Biden read his introductory speech, titled "We will fight them on the beaches" and which appeared to be lifted completely from Winston Churchill, except for several spelling and grammatical errors.
Obama walks out and a giant banner unfurls behind him that says "SUCKERS!" He then reveals that his master plan was to be president, and he hasn't really thought about anything after that, so he's turning the country over to unreformed 60's radicals who will attempt to destroy the economy and allow communists to run amok on the world stage.
Held over for inaugural address.
One of the Hostages called police immediately to report the hostage situation, then went to get some beer and ended up traveling cross country to drink the finest beer and eat the best bar grub he could get his hands on.
The other released Hostage waited until about 2:30AM that night to call police, where they engaged in a lengthy conversation, the dispatcher still isn't quite sure what the hell they were talking about. Police had resolved the rest of the situation peacefully hours ago, and the hostage taker is awaiting trial.
Upon release, one of the Hostages, a large, loud, self-proclaimed Man-Lesbian-American stated to reporters,
"I dunno, he was kind of a cool guy, other than the threats, angry rambling and mild stabbing, but it was getting seriously boring in there. No beer obviously, but there was nothing else either. Not even any somewhat chunky Eastern European women with gigantic melons. Hell, I'd take pictures, I usually do," (s)he said with a laugh. "And no Limp Bizkit, though I would have taken any wretched 90's rap/rock band at that point." Overhearing the bombastic man-lesbian, one of the other Hostages simply rolled his eyes and walked to his car to go home.
One of the female Hostages said the hostage taker kept asking for her number because he quote, "had a thing for redheads." She politely declined, despite having a knife angrily waved at her several times. Another Hostage noted she was happy about the situation, because it kept her from cheating on her new diet, while another wasn't happy with the liberal amount of cursing coming from the hostage taker.
August 27, 2008
From the elaborate stagecraft to the teeming crowd of 80,000 cheering partisans, the vagaries of the weather to the unpredictable audience reaction, the optics surrounding the stadium event have heightened worries that the Obama campaign is engaging in a high-risk endeavor in an uncontrollable environment.No, really? That could happen? Next thing, you'll tell me that the McCain campaign is hungrily waiting to turn clips from the event into a new series of commercials lampooning Obama's, uh, narcissism and celebrity status.
A common concern: that the stadium appearance plays against Obama’s convention goal of lowering his star wattage and connecting with average Americans and that it gives Republicans a chance to drive home their message that the Democratic nominee is a narcissistic celebrity candidate.
Another senior Obama aide noted Tuesday there were only two options for what the campaign wanted to accomplish — either do it in the convention hall, in front of the delegates, or somewhere else. “A diner’s not an option,” the aide said.Yeah, see, nobody's suggesting that. What we've been talking about is the idea that your guy feels the need to do something in front of a cheering crowd of tens of thousands of fans, some of whom may very well be using hand salutes to greet him, where most candidates have felt comfortable accepting their party's nomination in the not-unfriendly confines of the convention hall. Maybe you should ask yourself why that just wasn't good enough for Obama, though you might not like the rather obvious answer.
I actually mean it for once. Alas, Joe Lieberman is not a magnificent bastard:
Republican strategist Karl Rove called Sen. Joseph I. Lieberman (I-Conn.) late last week and urged him to contact Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) to withdraw his name from vice presidential consideration, according to three sources familiar with the conversation.
Lieberman dismissed the request, these sources agreed.
Lieberman “laughed at the suggestion and certainly did not call [McCain] on it,” said one source familiar with the details.
“Rove called Lieberman,” recounted a second source. “Lieberman told him he would not make that call.”
If this is accurate (remember it is the Politico) then Lieberman is held captive to the same foolish thinking that took hold in Alaska yesterday with who voted for Sen. Ted Stevens and Rep. Don Young. They may win this battle, but they'll lose the war in the November general elections.
McCain, who has pulled even with Barack Obama due in part to his very effective attacks on Obama's "celebrity," spent the evening collecting checks from Hollywood stars or people who once might have fit that description. Among those attending: Dean Cain (Superman); James Caan (Godfather I and II, Bottle Rocket); Jon Voight (Midnight Cowboy, Deliverance); Robert Davi (License to Kill); Lou Ferrigno (The Incredible Hulk); Adam Carolla (The Man Show); Lacy Chabert (Party of Five).
It's being reported that Mitt Romney is out of the running for John McCain's vice president.
I'm really afraid this means we will have and incredibly boring McCain-Pawlenty ticket.
At the Temple of Obama, reporters are expected to observe a level of decency and decorum demanded by the import of the moment and the presence of The One. No "Animal House” behavior permitted. Specifically, no “Toga” chants.Like the man says: Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing.
Oh, and it goes without saying that this kind of behavior will not be tolerated as a reaction to Will.I.Am's "song":
Out of the following VP candidates rumored to be on McCain's short list, which one DO YOU THINK HE WILL TAKE?
McCain I think will pick Pawlenty, and that's probably only because he knows he can't get away with putting Lieberman on there.
Out of the following VP candidates rumored to be on McCain's short list, which one WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE HIM TAKE?
I think this is pretty obvious if you read our crapblog, most of us at doubleplusundead have been all about Palin.
Out of the following VP candidates rumored to be on McCain's short list, which one WOULD YOU LEAST LIKE TO SEE HIM TAKE?
Lieberman, not because I dislike the guy, because I do like him, but I like him as respectable and civil opposition and as a generally decent (but mostly wrong on policy) guy, but not as a VP.
Vaguely related(since we're talking Presidential candidates and their VPs, but fucking hilarious.
I know, I know. I'm addicted to veepstakes nonsense. Deal with it, crackas! Byron York has been keeping an eye on the chatter for us over at The Corner and had this to say:
McCain is scheduled to be with his vice president at a rally in Dayton, Ohio at 11 a.m. Friday. Next, the pair will appear at a rally in Pennsylvania, in a small town south of Pittsburgh, at 5 p.m. Saturday. If memory serves, in 2000, Lieberman, an observant Jew, did not campaign or take part in campaign activities from Friday evening to Saturday evening. The Pennsylvania rally certainly seems to fall in that period. I am not saying that there might not be other factors at play in the rollout of McCain's choice, but it is hard to imagine that that would not be a factor.
Hmmmm. I doubt that this means much, but if we're reading the tea leaves right this could be a good sign for Rep. Eric Cantor who, like Jack Abramoff, is Jewish. We know that he has been vetted, has the support of conservatives, and would likely need a three-day "getting to know you" rollout as described.
I'd be 100% on-board with a McCain-Cantor ticket.
Update: Just wanted to remind everyone is still Jewish.
Update: It looks like I may have read that report all wrong. The schedule might mean there will be no Jewish VP.
Yet another update: Byron answers a question I've been asking:
It turns out Cantor does work and travel on Saturdays, so no, it doesn't appear that that would be a factor. On the other hand, I haven't heard anything to suggest that Cantor is in the final mix in the McCain veep search.
The phone poll, taken from August 21 to 24, surveyed 832 people and asked the question "Have you eaten dog food for any reason in the last two months?" 0.6% respondents answered "Yes", whereas only 0.2% of respondents in a similar poll taken in June answered affirmatively.
Poller John Zigby said that this signaled a shift in American attitudes about eating pet foods. "It used to be that only college students, two-year-olds, and the elderly ate dog food, but now we're apparently seeing more and more people eating it as a meal. I'll grant you that it is delicious, but to me this is an indictment of the entire military-industrial complex and the unlawful Bush war that has led to people eating first their pets, then pet food. Soon they will be reduced to devouring their shoe leather."
Both campaigns seized upon the poll as evidence of why they should be elected president, with Obama saying that McCain "will only continue to drive you to the pet-food instead of the whole-food aisle" and McCain telling an audience in Iowa that "the only choice Barack Obama can offer you is whether you want dry food or canned."
61 queries taking 0.0152 seconds, 181 records returned.
Powered by Minx 1.1.6c-pink.