August 19, 2008
Survey Reveals Internet Conservative's VP Wish List
A recent poll of the right-wing blogosphere reveals the following "Wish List" of qualities for a potential GOP vice-presidential running mate for John McCain:
81% said "Needs to know how to handle a gun."
75% said "Nominee should look good in assless chaps, and preferably owns a pair, and very preferably will wear them to the convention."
72% said "Must shore up McCain's conservative credentials, in reality and not as compared to the Democratic party or your average journalist."
65% said "Was not ever the Democratic nominee for anything, particularly president or vice president."
54% said "Must have executive experience, particularly in a state where large areas rarely register above zero and are currently off-limits to oil and gas drilling."
49% said "Must not be a desiccated fossil."
46% said "Is not Phil Gramm or other McCain cohort famous for 'crossing the aisle' and screwing the GOP on legislation."
43% said "Should be solidly pro-life, as evidenced by wearing tight sweaters which will make us glad to be alive."
42% said "Should not be a flaming moron."
31% said "Shouldn't be a GOP up-and-comer who will be forever tainted by the stink of failure that this election will inevitably bestow upon the loser, which is likely McCain."
27% said "Should have a name that rhymes with Fairy Sailin."
12% said "Should be distinguishable from Lamar Alexander, most importantly by not being Lamar Alexander."
4% said "Should adequately fill lead role in our recurring 'Naughty Librarian Fantasy'."
0.5% (Ace of Spades) said "Hnnggh, unnnggg, mmmm" when asked about specific choices, such as Sarah Palin.
81% said "Needs to know how to handle a gun."
75% said "Nominee should look good in assless chaps, and preferably owns a pair, and very preferably will wear them to the convention."
72% said "Must shore up McCain's conservative credentials, in reality and not as compared to the Democratic party or your average journalist."
65% said "Was not ever the Democratic nominee for anything, particularly president or vice president."
54% said "Must have executive experience, particularly in a state where large areas rarely register above zero and are currently off-limits to oil and gas drilling."
49% said "Must not be a desiccated fossil."
46% said "Is not Phil Gramm or other McCain cohort famous for 'crossing the aisle' and screwing the GOP on legislation."
43% said "Should be solidly pro-life, as evidenced by wearing tight sweaters which will make us glad to be alive."
42% said "Should not be a flaming moron."
31% said "Shouldn't be a GOP up-and-comer who will be forever tainted by the stink of failure that this election will inevitably bestow upon the loser, which is likely McCain."
27% said "Should have a name that rhymes with Fairy Sailin."
12% said "Should be distinguishable from Lamar Alexander, most importantly by not being Lamar Alexander."
4% said "Should adequately fill lead role in our recurring 'Naughty Librarian Fantasy'."
0.5% (Ace of Spades) said "Hnnggh, unnnggg, mmmm" when asked about specific choices, such as Sarah Palin.
Posted by: plebian at
04:02 PM
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1
75% said "Nominee should look good in assless chaps, and preferably
owns a pair, and very preferably will wear them to the convention."
Me and this mental image are going to enjoy some private time later.
Me and this mental image are going to enjoy some private time later.
Posted by: leoncaruthers at August 19, 2008 04:07 PM (SHR5S)
2
So we're nominating alexthechick?
Posted by: Moron Pundit at August 19, 2008 04:28 PM (83gRI)
3
All shall love me and despair!
Did I mention I'm going to be buying a new pair of glasses this weekend and my number one priority is how naughty librarian they look.
Did I mention I'm going to be buying a new pair of glasses this weekend and my number one priority is how naughty librarian they look.
Posted by: alexthechick at August 19, 2008 05:04 PM (jCGID)
4
Dude, you forgot to poll me. That 0.5% answer would've been 1% had I been asked.
Posted by: steveegg at August 19, 2008 06:08 PM (LvEFt)
5
No hobo strangling?
Posted by: eddiebear at August 19, 2008 09:31 PM (eYXq4)
6
The naughty librarian look could be the Next Big Thing if Palin is vp.
Alex will be on the cutting edge of fashion.
Alex will be on the cutting edge of fashion.
Posted by: Sockless Joe at August 19, 2008 10:54 PM (w4mWq)
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