doubleplusundead

September 29, 2008

Gore Mansion Destroyed in a Fire

Angry youths wearing green masks today stormed the Gore compound and burned it into the ground, declaring it “a hazard to children and other living creatures” because of its massive consumption of electricity, natural gas, and Ho-Hos. The rioters also overturned a Twinkie truck that was making a delivery.

There were no reported injuries.

The move comes just after Gore exhorted his followers to act with “civil disobedience” against any organization which might be harming the earth by carbon emissions. It was not clear at press time whether or not Mr. Gore had intended himself to be a target, and he was unavailable for comment due to being en route to Swaziland via private jet to collect the 2008 “Good Citizen’s Award for Fossil Fuel Avoidance.”

A spokesman for the protestors said that they intended to find Gore’s boat, which they had christened “The Goreitania”, and sink it as well.

“Al won’t mind,” he said. “He’s cool with us tearing stuff up and breaking windows to slake our thirst for environmental justice. After all, we’re just helping him live more simply, like when George Bush beat him in 2000 and retired him from politics. That’s why from now on, I’m voting Republican, to give our messiahs more time to concentrate on their vision!”

Posted by: plebian at 04:08 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
Post contains 219 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Is this scrappleface? Very good!

Posted by: halfacarafe at September 29, 2008 04:14 PM (5+Abn)

2 No, even better, it's plebian!

Posted by: doubleplusundead at September 29, 2008 04:21 PM (W4Uy5)

"It's scrappleface except FUNNY."

I have a sad feeling I'm going to need more and more plebian as the year goes on. Not a lot of good news politically or economically on the horizon.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at September 29, 2008 04:24 PM (83gRI)

4 I'll do what I can. I had a feeling you guys could use a pick-me-up. Even better, I've got posts for the most of the rest of the week worked out.

Posted by: plebian at September 29, 2008 04:27 PM (T7sE9)

Actually MP, it's times of turmoil where the real opportunities lie. Shaking up Washington is almost as good news as that of Gore's mansion being torched (plebian does straight news, right?).

I'm far from depressed ... I'm excited. Where there's risk, there's opportunity. Put the Prez election out of your mind (as I've said, I don't think it means much anymore) and think about all the good that could potentially come of a huge financial and political shake-up.

Posted by: Hermit Dave at September 29, 2008 05:08 PM (WhFvm)

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