August 31, 2007

Armorers Soon To Face Severe Shortage of Gauntlets

Yikes! In China, a woman cut off her internet addicted husband's hand after  promising to stop spending all his time online.  He swore he would stop going online and spend more time with his child, but he was soon sneaking off to internet cafes to do video chats with girls(I'm assuming chats of the adult variety).  On his last visit, he was online, and felt a numbness in his hand, and realized the mouse cursor wasn't moving, he looked down and his hand was severed and blood was spurting out.

The man pleaded with the court to show his wife mercy and drop the charges, saying it was his fault for breaking his promise.  So if you're significant other says to spend less time online...you may wanna take them seriously.

***Welcome again, Hotair Readers!  Feel free to look around and comment to your heart's content.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 02:10 PM | Comments (23) | Add Comment
Post contains 153 words, total size 1 kb.

1 All the more reason to focus on the development of those mind-controlled mice.  What's she going to cut off then?  Heh heh. Oh wait...

Posted by: TexasDan at August 31, 2007 03:58 PM (ZeYHR)

2 Yikes, even worse!

Posted by: doubleplusundead at August 31, 2007 04:06 PM (qCp9p)

3

***Welcome again, Hotair Readers!  Feel free to look around and comment to your heart's content.***

Yeah, yeah, yeah.  You gave us the big welcome, did your best to make us all feel comfortable and cozy.  All you politely asked for was a few comments.  And what did you get?

One measly comment.  Pathetic.

I've been keeping an eye on you...  You've been getting linked by ace and Hotair quite a few times lately.  And this is how they treat you.  Disgraceful.

In the future, the next time you get an ace-o-lanche or Hotair-storm, don't bother with the sweetness and light.  You gotta give 'em a good pimp slap right off the bat, to get their attention and respect.  You go arround trying to placate these  fickle, worthless moron-blog and allah-head commenters, and they'll piss in your face and tell you it's raining.

Honestly,  if you don't ride herd on these shirtless bastards, they'll just root arround the place for a while and leave the place worse off then  it was before, stinking of farts and B.O.

You gotta blog hard, or go home.  Wimp.

 

 

Posted by: Hotair reader at August 31, 2007 06:33 PM (zGHW/)

4 Looks like the cat dragged in something really smelly. Just look at all the stink and mess commenter #3 left!

Posted by: Tushar D at August 31, 2007 06:40 PM (9ULFg)

5

Oh great, now Tushar D is here.  Just what this blog needs, some Brown Person hanging arround.  Yeah, that'll really class the joint up.

Posted by: Hotair reader at August 31, 2007 07:14 PM (zGHW/)

6

Hey Hotair reader,

I'm down with the brown so back off Tushar.

Hey Sinistar, please tell me what 2X+Undead means.   I'm sure it's got a good back story but I don't know it.

Posted by: Rosetta at August 31, 2007 08:00 PM (6+5Wv)

7

Rossetta:  Yeah, you may be "down with the brown", but I'm not.  In fact, they terrify me.  When I saw Tushar here, I promptly shat myself in fear.  Fortunately, I was able to calm myself and type out my screed of hate.

As far as what "double plus undead" means, it is a reference to George Orwells "1984."  In it, to control the population, the state controlled and restricted the number of words the people could use.

In normal conversation, we use all sorts of words of varying meaning or intensity to convey subtlties of meanin.  For example:  House vs. Home.  Technically, these are synonyms.  But house has a more impersonal, commercial feel to it.  Home has a more warm, intimate feel.

So to help mentally lobotomize the people, the state in 1984 banned as many words as possible.  If you liked the food you were eating, you could call it "good".  But if it was delicious, or tasty, you would just call it "plus-good" or "double-plus good". 

The "un" was used the same way, to help reduce the vocabulary.  If you were tired, you were called "tired".  But if you were feeling alert or focused, you would instread use the term "un-tired" to describe your mental state.

So in this case, I'd say that the blog host is calling himself or the blog a zombie, or a member of the un-dead.  As indicated by the picture of the shambling zombies.  But the double-plus means he is a super powerful, or supercool zombie.

Don't bother thanking me for this, I'm happy to help, as I'm sure you aren't a terrrifying shade of brown.

Uh, right....?

 

Posted by: Hotair reader at August 31, 2007 09:04 PM (zGHW/)

8 Rosetta, the name came doubleplusundead from the fact that I had read World War Z, The Zombie Survival Guide, and 1984 in close proximity.  So I had a random mashing together in my mind of the Newspeak phrase doubleplusungood, and of course thinking of zombies, and it hit me, doubleplusundead, coincidentally I had been considering creating a blog, and I thought, hey!  This could be a good blog name, and so it was.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at August 31, 2007 09:27 PM (qCp9p)

9 Thanks for the explanations.  Very interesting.  And I'm only brown after long exposure to the sun.

Posted by: Rosetta at September 01, 2007 10:40 AM (omkIU)

10

Dude, thanks for the explanation---I've been thinking I was uncool and missed some obvious reason or pop-culture reference. Whew!

You should put that on an About page...

Posted by: Cuffy Meigs at September 05, 2007 03:06 PM (uOvAE)

11 I really should, it might help some people.  I get asked why I used the name a lot.

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