FAIL, Canadian Translator Edition

Warning! Naughty language.

Posted by: eddiebear at 08:26 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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"Fighting bacon with bacon"

What's the best way to fight swine flu? Well, try not to eat your helmet for starters...

Posted by: Sean M. at 12:47 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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Who Knew Snake Bitten Cock In A Pot Was So Popular?

Apparently, it's a big deal in China. So much so, the government there is trying to ban it.

"It's disgusting and really cruel," wrote one poster on the popular portal sina.com.cn.

"Not only is it cruel and blood-thirsty, but totally amoral," the Chongqing Business Daily cited a neighbor to one of the restaurants as saying.

Health authorities in Guangdong have already told restaurants to stop serving "poisonous snake-bitten chicken" and now those in Chongqing have joined in.

"Although nobody has been poisoned, this at the very least is an irregular way of slaughtering poultry," the business newspaper quoted a local health official as saying.

Posted by: eddiebear at 12:10 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Weapons Pr0n, Screeching Sound Edition

I can tell this guy has been around women before.

Sound (ahem) implausible? Look at the picture at right of test subjects getting the LRAD treatment. And take it from me: today at the Mock Riot, Scott Stuckey from American Technology Corp dialed the LRAD down to one of its lowest settings and swept it past me. It was like having a hundred nagging girlfriends in my brain screaming at me. Very unpleasant.

Posted by: eddiebear at 12:07 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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The Internet

is for porn.

And in keeping of the spirit of today...

Posted by: Alice H at 11:18 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Axes, chainsaws, and frying pans

I can't freaking wait!

A detailed hands-on review is available at RockPaperShotgun.

Oh, in case you missed it from a month ago, here's some more chainsaws.


Yeah, I'm trying to make our page slow as hell to load today.

Posted by: Alice H at 10:07 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Yeah, California sucks...

...but at least we don't have to put up with visits from the Hucktard.

Seriously, this soon?

Posted by: Sean M. at 09:46 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Twittish pubs

It seems our cousins across the pond are doing their best to regulate traditional pub life out of existence:

Traditionally pubs have been highly individualized places, distinguished by their eccentric furnishings, varied clientele, and the differing characters of their landlords. Some pubs went in for beer tankards, others for old photos. And while strict landlords kicked everyone out at 11:10 p.m., others let you stick around for an hour or offered "lock-ins." Now pubs are distinguished by their local council's brand of regulation. Preston Council banned "vertical drinking" (drinking standing up). Many other pubs have prohibited drinking outside, or will only allow drinking behind a line on the pavement. In a Home Office test-scheme in Yeovil, customers are fingerprinted and photographed at the pub door, and local pubs will "share information" on drinkers.

Well, that's a little disturbing, now innit?

Believe it or not, the thing about "vertical drinking" isn't the most ridiculous part of the article. Read the whole thing and wonder how these candy-asses are the descendants of the people who survived the Blitz and once ruled over one of the largest empires the world had ever seen. Seriously, I think they need Zombie Churchill to come back and sort them out.

Posted by: Sean M. at 08:41 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I'd fire my pit crew if they were that slow

But seriously, tell me the Godzilla doesn't make you ache to play the L4D Tank.

InB4 new and exciting ways to have virtual sex...

Posted by: Alice H at 08:39 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Murder At A Recruiting Station

*** I held off posting this until more information was made available.

I'm very curious as to the motivations of this douchebag*.

As it follows directly on the heels of this bastardization of justice I'd just like to make an appeal to both sides of the political.

Can we please.  Stop. Fucking. Blowing these isolated events out of proportion?

The guy that shot the abortion murderer was a fucking lunatic who is not supported by 99.9% of the people on "his side."  Similarly, 99.9% of the people who are on the other side of the isle or perhaps are anti-military would reject similarly violent activities in the pursuit of their goal.

A man shooting an abortion doctor doesn't prove abortion is evil and guns are evil any more than the shooting of an Army recruiter proves the war in Iraq is righteous and leftists are anti-American**. 

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar and sometimes a random shooting is just that.  Some random asshole acting like an asshole.

* - There is almost no information at this point but allow me to make a small leap of logic and assume the guy that shot up the place had a problem with the military.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 08:07 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Um...

Source

Posted by: Alice H at 05:04 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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If You Like Amtrak, You'll Love The New O-GMChryslerCarEleventy!Motors Company

A bloated, inefficeint, money losing venture that few people want? Sign me up!

With Amtrak, the government got too involved in decision-making, leading to inefficiencies in the system that would never be corrected, say analysts. Since its creation in 1970, Amtrak has sucked up $30 billion in taxpayer money, and the money is still flowing. The original aid package from Congress in 1970 was $340 million with an expectation the railroad would make a profit in five years.

The potential parallels are worth being concerned about, critics say.

"I think the $50 billion might as well be kissed goodbye. I would expect that this is just the beginning," Cox, principal at the Wendell Cox Consultancy, said of the GM deal.

"I think the long-term outcome will be the same," said Ronald Utt, a senior research fellow at the conservative Heritage Foundation. "It's unlikely to ever recover the huge investment that's been made in it, and you will then be carrying this forever and ever and ever. (The government has) been carrying Amtrak now for more than 35 years."

Conservatives in Washington treated Monday's announcement with a hefty dose of skepticism. They called for a clearly stated exit strategy and said GM's success is by no means assured.

"Does anyone really believe that politicians and bureaucrats in Washington can successfully steer a multinational corporation to economic viability?" House Minority Leader John Boehner said in a written statement.

Though the rhetorical question might sound like a recycled GOP talking point, the analysts who spoke to FOXNews.com say the fear is justified. The government will have a hard time resisting getting closely involved in GM management, leading to the kind of problems that dogged Amtrak over the decades.

Utt and Cox said parochial, political interests have driven Amtrak to make ineffective decisions -- like maintaining costly, long-distance lines and setting up inefficient routes that detour through low-population areas.

Amtrak has experienced a boost in ridership recently, which its management attributes in part to high gas prices and better service. Though it is still in the red, Amtrak reported a record 28.7 million passengers in fiscal year 2008, marking its sixth straight year of record ridership.

The company notes on its fact sheet that "no country in the world operates a passenger rail system" without public support.

At the same time, Amtrak reported earning $2.45 billion in fiscal year 2008, and racking up $3.38 billion in expenses. Congress last year committed another $13 billion over five years to the rail service, with proponents of the investment saying at the time that the service had been underfunded for too long and this would finally help "rebuild" Amtrak.

Great. Just fucking great!

Posted by: eddiebear at 04:12 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Question for the pro-abortion* element of society...

I was perusing Google News and saw the picture associated with this story.

My question is this:  If I kick a woman who is 8-months pregnant down the stairs and kill her ... whatever it is you'd fucking call it**,  should I be simply charged with assault and send her a bill?

* - Being pro-choice is one thing, I suppose, but calling Tiller a hero is disgusting.  I think that woman should be forced to watch what he did for a living for a few months Clockwork Orange style.  That bitch is simply pro-abortion, a position that is morally indefensible.

** - I'll call it a baby because that's what it fucking is.  Sorry for the lack of nuance.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 03:36 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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This can and does work

If people will commit to it.  Hugh Hewitt is advocating a boycott of GM and Chrysler as long as they are government owned operations.  He correctly notes that government run, formerly privately owned auto companies don't succeed anyway, but we're also going to end up subsidizing this disaster for as long as it is around as a government run institution. 

Boycotts work, and I'm going to go back to examples of Second Amendment activist success to show that this works.  During the 90's, one of the things the Democrats were going to do to try and destroy the Second in the US was team up with cities and individuals to file suit against firearms manufacturers.  Unless those manufacturers agreed to a bunch of abusive limitations, nanny restrictions and and other Orwellian obscenities, individuals and cities, backed by the Feds would sue manufacturers into oblivion.

The industry agreed as a whole to tell the Administration to get bent, and they'd fight the extortion tooth and nail.  Except Smith & Wesson, then owned by a British firm (and as we all know, the Brits are unwilling to stand up to authoritarians), they caved and signed the agreement in 2000, what is known as S&W's Deal With The Devil. 

Consumers and activists were furious, and almost immediately demand for S&Ws collapsed and the market was flooded with used ones.  In about a year, S&W was sold to a US firm at a huge loss, the US firm immediately rejected the Deal With The Devil, and S&W has since recovered quite nicely, though it took years to regain consumer trust.

The good news is that Bush signed legislature passed by Congress afterwards to try and prevent that sort of extortion scheme from being enacted again.  The Democrats are afraid to try and roll that back too, because they know they lose elections when they piss off the NRA and activists. 

If we stand firm, and make it known that what is happening is unacceptable to us, and we do refuse to buy new GM and Chryslers, or even go so far as to sell our current ones in protest, a strong message will be sent, and they will have to listen. 

I can assure you, my next vehicle won't be a GM or Chrysler. 

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 12:50 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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Distributed Moron Knowledge Powers Activate!

Help me Moronia, you're my only hope.  So I'm trying to think through the GM disaster and my current question is this - if the US Govt. is a shareholder, who casts the proxy vote?  Secretary of Treasury?  Seriously, I'm trying to sort this out.  Does Congress direct it?  The Supremes?  Seriously, who?

Come through for me Morons, I know you can do it!

Bipartisan encouragement (Terminator: Hotass Edition) for answering beneath the fold.
more...

Posted by: alexthechick at 12:17 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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A Little Clean Fun

Warning: Net Nanny is not amused by the language.

Posted by: eddiebear at 11:48 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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From The "Duh" Files

 Obama gets fawning media coverage.

But the irony about this otherwise "no shit, Sherlock" article is how sad this quote really is:

Our political system works best when a president faces checks on his power. But the main checks on Obama are modest. They come from congressional Democrats, who largely share his goals if not always his means. The leaderless and confused Republicans don't provide effective opposition. And the press -- on domestic, if not foreign, policy -- has so far largely abdicated its role as skeptical observer.

Silly Rabbit, did you really expect the Mediacrats to attack and investigate Obama as vigorously as they did Bush? And you claim to be an intelligent person? I am just some dumb hillbilly who barely wears pants, but even I could see this coming.

But, this article gets better, as the author tries to explain away the bias:

Obama's rhetoric brims with inconsistencies. In the campaign, he claimed he would de-emphasize partisanship -- and also enact a highly-partisan agenda; both couldn't be true. He got a pass. Now, he claims he will control health care spending even though he proposes more government spending. He promotes "fiscal responsibility" when projections show huge and continuous budget deficits. Journalists seem to take his pronouncements at face value even when many are two-faced.

The cause of this acquiescence isn't clear. The press sometimes follows opinion polls; popular presidents get good coverage, and Obama is enormously popular. By Pew, his job performance rating is 63 percent. But because favorable coverage began in the campaign, this explanation is at best partial.

Perhaps the preoccupation with the present economic crisis has diverted attention from the long-term implications of other policies. But the deeper explanation may be as straightforward as this: most journalists like Obama; they admire his command of language; he's a relief after Bush; they agree with his agenda (so it never occurs to them to question basic premises); and they don't want to see the first African-American president fail.

Whatever, a great edifice of government may arise on the narrow foundation of Obama's personal popularity. Another Pew survey shows that since the election both self-identified Republicans and Democrats have declined. "Independents" have increased, and "there has been no consistent movement away from conservatism, nor a shift toward liberalism."

The press has become Obama's silent ally and seems in a state of denial. But the story goes untold: Unsurprisingly, the study of all the favorable coverage received little coverage.

Lemme try this one for you, Professor Clueless: the Media is not investigating Obama and skewering him because they went all in to help him get elected. No fucking way in hell they will let him fail, since if he fails, they fail.

Q.E. Fucking D.

 

 

Posted by: eddiebear at 11:45 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Words My Grandfather Couldn't Have Imagined

"General Motors filed for bankruptcy and was kicked out of the Dow industrial index."

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 11:10 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Best troll slayling idea ever.

Seriously. This is the best idea to get rid of internet trolls ever.

I would pay cash money for this to happen.  Cash.  Money.

Posted by: alexthechick at 09:16 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 29 words, total size 1 kb.