Here is how I am going to endure the Age of the Messiah.

Posted by: eddiebear at 01:44 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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Apparently Portland mayor Sam Adams, the first openly gay mayor of a major city, has been in office less than a month and already has a sex scandal.  He slept with a legislative intern who was 17 years old at the time (he's now 21). 

The kid's name?  Beau Breedlove.  Seriously.  Gayest name ever in the history of ever.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 01:03 AM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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There is no excuse for ruining the Messiah's Ascension.  I'm quoting the whole thing* :

There is simply no excuse for United States Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts bungling the presidential oath of office to such an extent that Barack Obama might need to do it again, at least in private, to ensure the legality of his inauguration.

Roberts should be impeached and removed from office for this unforgivable error. The Constitution requires certain language for a presidential oath of office. Roberts blew it. And if he doesn't understand such things he should be fired for misfeasance of the first order.

I guess this tool missed the fact that two other inauguration oaths have had to be retaken, apparently without requiring the impeachment of the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.  I suppose this new impeachment requirement is what "Change^tm" meant.  Oh, by the way, you'll never guess which station has hired this genius as a media analyst.

*Good luck suing me, Craigy, I have no money or savings or anything.  Certainly no unicorn farm yet.

(h/t)

Update: Even President Obama says that Chief Justice Roberts isn't to blame:

“We’re up there, we’ve got a lot of stuff on our mind, and he actually helped me out on a couple of stanzas there,” Obama told ABC News backstage at the “Neighborhood Ball.”

“So overall, I think it went relatively smoothly and I’m very grateful to him.”

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 11:52 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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"I love being told I have to make the hard sacrifices by a guy who can't quit smoking." - Dennis Miller on Obama's inaugural speech.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 10:26 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Remember my "Dear Celebrities" post from the other night?  Well, Iowahawk has a transcript of the video.

Posted by: Sean M. at 09:27 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Very busy.
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Posted by: Moron Pundit at 09:15 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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You may have forgotten, but other Presidents besides Obama had inaugurations, too.  Here are some neat pictures to prove it!

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 07:34 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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The Senator has a fevuh, and the only prescription is more Hopenchange^tm:

“It’s really not a time to be obstructionist,” Ensign, chairman of the Senate Republican Policy Committee, said on Fox News. “It’s a time where we as a party need to try to work with especially President Obama and try to solve some of the country’s problems.”

[...]

The Republican senator, who praised Obama for having some “really good ideas” coming into office, said given the myriad of challenges facing the nation, it is time to “put the country before our party.”

The sad part is that they probably will be more helpful to President Obama than the Democrats in the Senate.  With few exceptions, Republican Senators are squishes who either lack or have severely misplaced principles.  Democrats, however, will (maybe) spend a good deal of time criticizing Dear Leader whenever he veers to the right of Lenin.  Depressing.

Oh, and just to remind everyone, Sen. Ensign was the head of the NRSC the last election cycle.  I wonder why we lost so many seats?

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 06:54 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Talk about a pick me up after the Coronation.

The former president, who ruled France for 12 years until 2007, was taken to hospital in Paris where he was treated as an outpatient and sent home, VSD magazine reported.

Mrs Chirac said: 'The dog went for him for no apparent reason.

'We were already aware the animal was unpredictable and is actually being treated with pills for depression.

'My husband was bitten quite badly, but he is certain to make a full recovery over the coming weeks.'

The former French First Lady did not reveal where on his body Chirac was bitten.

The pet, named after the Japanese form of wrestling, was a gift to the Chiracs from their grandson Martin.

My wife always tells me that dogs can detect bad people. Maybe this is an example.

Posted by: eddiebear at 05:26 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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I have an on-going interest in all the real estate shenanigans and the impact on the economy. See prior screeching about this. Today I read this article on banks foreclosing on builders not in default and I don't know what to think. (Yes, yes, I know, it's a NYT article. Hey, just because it's in there doesn't always mean it's wrong. Just. Nearly always)

Random thoughts and a question for those who can actually subtract 9 from 15 below the fold.
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Posted by: alexthechick at 05:05 PM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
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Of course, you could say that about anyone that Joe Biden criticizes, but referring to his statements today about Chief Justice John Roberts' flubbing of the Presidential oath.  You know, the one that Chairman Obama screwed up, too.   

Remember, those memes don't create themselves. 

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 03:08 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Let's make this official. 

This blog finds that the defendant, Kathleen Parker cannot be a conservative because she had a full-body twitch during the Inauguration yesterday.  For that reason you will be expelled from the conservative movement.   May God have mercy on your soul because we won't:

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 02:19 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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Compare:



Contrast:



(Thanks to Slu for the latter.)

Posted by: Sean M. at 01:45 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Mmmmmm cheese fries. 

I thought it was time to post something fantastic to take our minds off how utterly fucked we are.  Thus I present these



I saw these described as Russian hooker shoes and I totally agree!  Of course, I think they meant that as a criticism.  Pfffft.  No.  Come on, wouldn't you spill all the nuclear codes to Svetlana were she wearing only these and matching earrings?  I thought so.

Oh and I do believe that some pretty girl is also needed - btw this is proof that sometimes a girl doesn't have to been in lingerie and wearing thigh high boots while holding a gun to be hot.  Though that certainly doesn't hurt.

Oh and note that when you clicky more on my posts?  THERE'S A PRETTY GIRL NOT CLOWNS.  Ahem.


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Posted by: alexthechick at 01:08 PM | Comments (15) | Add Comment
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I just love it when liberal Beltway pundits offer advice to the Republican Party on how to win.

At a time when Republicans should be starting to think about how they can expand their party to reclaim those who abandoned it, the party is instead lurching ever more to the right, exacerbating its problems. Many people who watched the recent debate between contenders for the chairmanship of the Republican National Committee came away thinking that the only memorable moments were when each candidate expressed love and devotion for Ronald Reagan and when all but one bragged about how many guns they own. Not to belittle the importance of Reagan's iconic status or the Second Amendment, but when the only takeaways are about the importance of a political figure who last won an election a quarter-century ago and how big a person's arsenal is, these guys are not hot prospects to chair the GOP's Welcome Wagon, much less to lead the party out of its wilderness.

For anyone who thinks that it is important to our democracy to have two strong, vibrant parties and that having both major parties healthy keeps the system accountable, seeing one of those parties being self-destructive is not encouraging.

Beyond the fact that an inwardly focused Republican Party will have a hard time restoring its lost support, it's hard to embody Reagan's "Big Tent" approach when you are pushing folks who don't totally agree with you out of the tent. Especially for Republicans on Capitol Hill, the narrowing of the GOP presents a challenge as lawmakers try to develop policies to help pull the country out of its horrible economic decline.

With the Federal Reserve Board having dropped interest rates to practically zero, only two other major instruments to fight recession remain: government spending and tax cuts. Democrats tend to think that spending is the way to go and typically aren't wild about most tax cuts. Conversely, Republicans believe that tax cuts are the preferable route and disdain new spending. President-elect Obama is putting together a package that incorporates both, hoping to build bipartisan support and professing his fear that doing too little is more dangerous than doing too much. The fact that neither congressional Democrats nor congressional Republicans are in love with his package suggests that Obama may have found a good balance.

But if Republican lawmakers have to look over their shoulders and worry that backing a balanced stimulus plan would trigger serious primary challenges, they could be intimidated into jeopardizing measures needed to get the country out of the recession, into further isolating their party by making it more extremist, or both.

Gee, thanks buddy. 

Posted by: eddiebear at 12:44 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I'll give you a hint: her name rhymes with "Rathleen Rarker."

Sitting on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, extremities numb despite layers of wool, and seeing so many gathered to witness this thing they called "change" was, dare I say it, awesome. That most-annoying hipster term for anything remotely acceptable is suddenly useful for its intended purpose.

For awe is the truest word to describe what transpired and what was inspired.

Is there any way that we can excommunicate this gigantic fucking tool from the ranks of the conservative movement?  Because I'm getting really sick of her bullshit.  And I'm pretty sure I can get an "amen" from most of you.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go punch a wall.

(h/t)

Posted by: Sean M. at 12:19 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Looks like Mr. Satire wasn't too happy with The Coronation yesterday.

How long before he reappears on the air, sporting a bandage on the frontal lobe area, mouthing "Barack is Great"?

Posted by: eddiebear at 11:40 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Where have I seen people make human mosaics of their political leaders...where could that be...oh, right.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 10:39 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Apparently the Anti-Drinking warriors have realized a strategic withdrawal was in order:

Mothers Against Drunk Driving will dramatically downsize its Wisconsin operation at the end of the month, according to Heidi Castle, vice president of communications for MADD.

Wisconsin Executive Director Kari Kinnard and the Wisconsin development director have been notified that their jobs will be terminated at the end of the month. The office will remain open with a single employee, the victim advocate, Castle said.

The change comes just as the state's Legislature is considering dramatic changes to drunken driving laws for the first time in years.

"Unfortunately, it is bad timing," Castle said. "It really has to do with the economy. Like most other nonprofits, we're feeling the problems with the economy."

From the other side of the debate, Roger Showalski had this to say:

Idzz abut time thes idjuts pulled out of Wiscunsun.  Idzz a quagmire, therr Veetnum.  No beer for oil.  Who wuntz to be the last sober man for a lie?

He then stopped pissing out window of his AMC Concord and drove away.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 09:59 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Hope and Change is sweeping through Guantanamo Bay:

In one of its first actions, the Obama administration instructed military prosecutors late Tuesday to seek a 120-day suspension of legal proceedings involving detainees at the naval base at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba -- a clear break with the approach of the outgoing Bush administration.

Army Col. Patrick Parrish promptly put one of the cases on hold Wednesday morning, and the disposition of several others is expected to become clear later in the day. Parrish is overseeing the trial of Omar Khadr, a Canadian accused of killing a U.S. soldier in Afghanistan when he was 15. Khadr's trial was about to begin, but the defense did not object to a delay until May 20 and Parrish issued the necessary order.

I have a great idea.  Why don't we have all the Guantanamo murdering terrorist scum detainees shipped to D.C. and let them live at the White House?  Surely being surrounded by such innocent, upstanding members of the human race could only serve to enhance the One's glory.

Time to keep a running total -

• Smart Things Obama Has Done:  0
• Dumb Things Obama Has Done:  1
• Evil Things Obama Has Done: 0

Fellow Bloggers, feel free to update these totals in any blog posts you may make.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 09:45 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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