A few years ago, Maddox did a piece on the surge of EXTREME! Marketing.  I'm sure you saw this trend as well, if not on stuff you were buying, it was certainly in commercials on television and anywhere else an ad can be placed. 

Green has become the new X-TREME.  Nearly every car commercial now focuses on fuel efficiency.  I can deal with a handful of commercials that mention good gas mileage in passing, but when it begins to be an echo chamber, it starts to piss you off. 

Subaru is the worst offender, with a series of sappy commercials that must make Alvengelical Envirocultists and smug self righteous Limosine Liberals tight in the pants.  If I or one of you morons pityclicking my blog can find an online clip of this liberal morality porn, I'll post it, but till then you'll have to turn on a TV and watch the fucking thing yourself, but here's an article on it.

The commercial has a young guy in cheesy looking clothes only a college professor would find to be in good taste, and a caring, compassionate look on his face, with a lush forest background and a deer in the foreground.   He goes on to explain just how much Subaru cares about the environment, and they built a plant that's super eco friendly, and they don't use any landfill space, and all sorts of vapid platitudes about their environmental efforts. Vomit inducing, its such sappy bullshit, I'm tired of hearing it, and I hope the people who decided this ad campaign was a brilliant idea refer back to one of Maddox's other articles  so maybe they can redeem themselves for unleashing this feelgood hippie crap on the American populace. 

But here's the thing, even shit that is obviously NOT eco-friendly or has no relevence to the environment are being pimped as eco-friendly.  It literally means nothing to be eco-friendly.  So why even say it?  Is this just a trend, or is it more?

I hope to God that we have not reached a point where businesses are literally cowering at the Gilded Lily Alvengelicals, and are doing this out of fear.  Though it could be, even Big Oil is playing along with this bilge, and that ought to be telling. 

There was a point in American history where these EnviroCultists would have been too embarrassed to publicly talk about this Global Warming crap outside of a few hangouts for asshole hipsters and the back rooms of academia.  

There was also a point when cars didn't suck, they were big shiny roaring beasts covered in chrome, rolling works of art.  How far we've fallen. Need proof, look at the Prius, if that car were food, it would be stale marshmallow circus peanuts, without food coloring.  Its a plastic peanut, built for people who had their nuts removed ages ago.

The Prius drivers are almost as bad, living up to every stereotype that is cast upon them.  I once saw a Prius with a plate begging you to ask for his MPGs.  I was begging for an RPG, but it didn't materialize.  Which is bullshit, I wanna RPG one fucking hippie douche in his Smugmobile and I'm not allowed, yet God gets to annihilate how many people in the Old Testament? 

I can't wait till the backlash against the Alvengelicals is recognized, and every pound of carbon that wasn't belched forth into the atmosphere because of this hippie shakedown is sent up in the massive bonfire of Priuses, windmills and solar panels in mere hours.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 10:56 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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