Will it Blend? That is the Question...

A man in Florida nearly loses his hand in an industrial blender.

This entire post was a setup for a Blendtec reference...God I hate myself.

Anyway, what the hell compels a guy to stick his hand in an industrial fucking blender?  He was at a vitamin store, I presume to make smoothies with supplements and shit, but hell if I know.  Was he high?  He had to be, or a really, really stupid guy.  Maybe he was a former high school football captain.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 09:09 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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OK, Now That Amnesty Appears to Be Dead, Back to Weird Random Stories

Like this one, though this one is more infuriating than anything.  A 65 year old man was experiencing diabetic shock on an Amtrak train in Arizona.  The crew decided that the guy was drunk and disorderly and threw the guy off the train in the middle of a fucking National Forest!  Now they can't find the guy.  Brilliant. 

Are the people working on these trains really not able to identify diabetic shock?  You would think that these crewmembers on the train would know what a diabetic shock is and looks like, or any other basic health emergency, even without training, this is pretty commonsense.  This is doubly true given how many people are diabetic. 

UPDATE:

The guy has been found.

He's in the hospital for dehydration.  He was found wandering near the tracks.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 08:52 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Open Amnesty Post

Any info you may have can be posted here, or if you want to help in some way with a mySQL or any sort of technical crap that's over my head and don't have a HotAir/MichelleMalkin account, you can post here.  You can just put in a name and a bogus email to comment.

UPDATE:

Some of the AoS morons that read here are/were probably confused, so here you go.  A few HotAir people are/were working on putting together a  system to  dredge up campaign  contributions from sellout senators(things from agribusiness, construction and whoever would benefit from open borders/amnesty) , and were trying to find someone with MySQL and other things, I posted when it was being discussed that if there were any lurkers (as HA has a restrictive registration, plus lurkers who don't want to comment normally) who could help in any way but couldn't comment at HA could post here and I'd get in contact with those who were working on it.

I would have replied earlier, but the storms in PA yesterday fucked the internet, so I couldn't really do anything then.  Sorry for the confusion and my technical ignorance.  Of course you can help if you want too...
 

You can go here, this is what they're working on, I guess.  Again, I'm pretty bad with this kind of stuff.

http://code.google.com/p/contribminer/

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 10:21 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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Sorry for the Lack of Posts

I've been focused on the Amnesty nightmare.  I hope to return to dredging up stupid stories with the occasional political beatdown soon....

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 01:38 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
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New Armored Vehicle for the Brits

As the Article says, it does have a bit of a Mad Max thing going for it.

Its fast, got a grenade launcher and a few machine gun mounts, looks like it would be good for use in Afghanistan, as the article says, I'm not sure an open vehicle like that would handle the IEDs that are planted everywhere in Iraq.

Though I have to say, this comment on the article made me laugh;

A serious bit of kit indeed - however, why has it taken so long to deploy and still will not be with our front-line forces until "early next year"!
Given the size of it, the weight of it, and the potential speed of it, no doubt some pen-pusher will decide that it does not conform to E.U. regulations on carbon footprint.

Heh.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 11:11 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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FAIL

This Guy.


This is usually a telling sign that God in fact hates you.  Nothing like getting caught in a window while trying to to burglarize a home, and having pictures taken for posterity.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 11:02 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Fall of a Legend?

Competitive eating champion Takeru Kobayashi is suffering from arthritis in his jaw.  Kobayashi is famous for winning the Nathan's Famous Hot Dog eating contest several years running, blowing away everyone in his path.  He has devoured over 50 hot dogs in these contests.  I guess even something like competitive eating has its risks.  Question, Is Nicole Ritchie a competitive Non-Eater?  She looks like an extra from Schindler's List...

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 10:45 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Don't Interrupt a Yahtzee Junkies Game

Holy Shit!

The rapacious roller was playing Yahtzee with another man's girlfriend.  The man went to bed with his girlfriend, and the disgruntled dice thrower stabbed him to death.  Yikes!

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 05:46 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Dianne Feinstein "Looking Into" Fairness Doctrine, Lott Says You're an Ignorant Rube

Whatever you hear, and whether or not specific discussions of the Fairness Doctrine happened, it is being discussed, and don't believe a word otherwise.

I don't trust Lott either.  He'll sell out.  The guy is a slimeball.  He goes on to say that you talk radio listeners are too stupid and ignorant to understand this amnesty bill.

Capitol Hill needs an enema, they're all corrupt slimeballs.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 04:50 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Vapid Moron At HuffPo Says Bush is Actually Worse Than Hitler

The guy used to be a writer for Seinfeld, he believes Hitler was actually less evil than Hitler.

Mehlman claims its because Hitler and other murderous despots were at least trying to act in the best interests of the nation, despicable and wrong as they were, as opposed to Bush, who is acting in the interests of his close friends to screw over the nation.  I'd break down the piece and rip it to shreds, but it simply isn't worth it.

Former British Prime Minister Tony Blair pretty accurately described people like Mehlman effectively in his speech criticising the media's coverage of the Iraq War and the campaign against Jihadists that we have been engaging in. 

First, scandal or controversy beats ordinary reporting hands down. News is rarely news unless it generates heat as much as or more than light. Second, attacking motive is far more potent than attacking judgement. It is not enough for someone to make an error. It has to be venal. Conspiratorial. Watergate was a great piece of journalism but there is a PhD thesis all on its own to examine the consequences for journalism of standing one conspiracy up.

That I think sums up what Mehlman and his leftist sycophants are precisely.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 04:06 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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Teachersecks?

This guy got busted for banging his 15 year old student, and then claimed he thought she was her older sister.  Of course the cops quicky figured out that the girl doesn't have an older sister.  Its good to see that our education system only hires the best and brightest to teach our youth. 

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 12:40 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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One of Those Stories You'll Tell For the Rest of Your Life

This guy has one, and it'll be hard to beat.  Just read this sucker, I don't know if there is anything I could add to this story.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 02:51 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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With My Mind On My Mommy And My Mommy On My Mind

A sixteen year-old Mother of the Year and probable lifetime failure gets charged with child abuse for giving her ten month old gin and juice.  Yeah, fo' shizzle, its fo' rizzle.  One question for the baby though, was the chronic bubonic, homie?

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 02:42 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Jesse Jackson and Fr. Michael Pfleger Arrested for Tresspassing

Nice. Like any typical Liberal shitheels, Jackson and Pfleger blame a few chunks of inanimate metal for the actions of vicious gang members.  Do they bother to go after the gangs, ask for more police help, assistance in building charitable systems to get people away from gang life and poverty?  No,  they harass some guy with a gunshop outside of Chicago. 

Who is Fr. Michael Pfleger?  Oh, no one real important, just some leftist doucherocket in a frock who thinks he can threaten to snuff out this gun store owner he got arrested for harrassing yesterday.

 Pfleger is reckless, he needs to first be publicly reprimanded by the Bishop of the Archdiocese.  The Bishop needs to publicly apologize to the owner and staff of this store for the harrassment they have received.  He needs to be ordered to end his demagoguery, and if he fails to comply, then he needs to be transferred or taken off of active priesthood, and if he still refuses to comply, then there needs to be move into more serious action by the hierarchy. 

You may be asking why I'm not calling for Pfleger to apologize.  The reason is because he wouldn't be sorry, and any apology given by him would be a lie, and I see no reason to make him lie too, unless it would really piss him off, then do make him apologize to piss him off.

Unless there is a large body of proof that the gunshop is working to avoid gun laws or is ignoring them to sell to gangs, with actual, indisputable proof that the guns purchased were from this gunshop, I'm calling bullshit on the premise that this shop is a supplier to gangs.

 And even if they were doing shady dealings, then upping gun control across the board isn't gonna do jack shit, killers always find a way, and Jackson and Pfleger know it.  I'm also guessing that a gunshop that was actively catering to gang members could be shut down with existing laws anyway.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 02:29 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Undertakers Like Arts and Crafts Too!

An undertaker was busted for stealing a skull and a thigh off a body.  The casket had cracked open as he was working to bury it, so he decided to take some souvenirs.  What was he going to do with them?  Why, he was gonna make a really boss ashtray, obviously! 

He ended up getting caught when he decided to kill his wife's dog, she then found the body parts he had stowed away, and she called the corpse cops.  It is likely that he was stealing parts from old graves, because the old gravesites are less secure.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 02:02 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Obamassiah Overturns Tables, Says Some Religious Leaders Have Hijacked Faith

And if you thought he was talking about Radical Islamists, you just earned yourself a year in purgatory, O ye foolish sinner. 

The Obamassiah was talking to you little freakie deakie, Holy Roller, Praise the Lord and Pass the Ammo, abortion clinic bombing, Snake Handlin', tongue speaking  Jesus freaks that won't worship your real Lord and Savior, the Obamassiah himself.  And lo, Obamassiah spoketh to the crowd.

"There was even a time when the Christian Coalition determined that its number one legislative priority was tax cuts for the rich," Obama said. "I don't know what Bible they're reading, but it doesn't jibe with my version."

Hmm, well, maybe that's because they understand that Socialism isn't nearly as good at feeding poor people as a free market, you braindead twat.  Plus there is that whole seperation of Church and State thing, and that question of how a church thrives when a gov't takes most of a person's extra income?  Of course it we all know it doesn't, but Our Lord and Savior certainly knows as much.

"Part of it's because of the so-called leaders of the Christian Right, who've been all too eager to exploit what divides us," the Illinois senator said.

Exploit what divides? Or simply stating the fact that that major beliefs held by the left and make up a large part of the Democratic Party platform are simply incompatible with the beliefs and teachings of the church. 

This may be shocking to liberal Democrats, but some people won't cherrypick their religious beliefs to be based on what they wished the Bible said, as opposed to what they believe it actually says.

"At every opportunity, they've told evangelical Christians that Democrats disrespect their values and dislike their church, while suggesting to the rest of the country that religious Americans care only about issues like abortion and gay marriage, school prayer and intelligent design," according to an advance copy of his speech.

Hmph.  That's because the base and elite of the Left do disrespect and dislike Evangelicals, any trip into the feverswamps of the nutroots can and does produce mountains of proof of this, or a thorough examination of Liberal writers and talking heads will show the same underlying disgust, but with a little more restraint in the actual spoken word.

Theological conservatives believe gay relationships violate Scripture, while more liberal Christians emphasize the Bible's social justice teachings.

Heh, I like this line, the writer got sloppy so the bias is oozing out in the open. 

Lemme translate from News-Speak back to the Original American Leftist:

 Stupid fundie rightwingers sit around and think of ways to oppress and torment those wicked homusexshuls, probably joking about killing some flamboyant gay guy, because all fundies opposed to gay marriage are actually uncomfortable with their own latent homosexuality.  Liberal Christians are useful idiots or simply playing a PR game to help us advance our Socialist Leftist agenda, and occasionally offer a squishy, benign teaching from the Bible or Church teaching.


Its so tiresome to see these people on the left try and pretend they like religious people, its such a blatant charade.  The religious are to Liberals  what humans are to the VUX. 

I even agree with Obama superficially, that gay marriage should be decided in the states.   Of course, I would condition that with making it through the legislative process, either through the state legislature or through referendum, the judicial branch is for enforcing law, not making it.

 I honestly don't care personally about state sanctioned gay marriage, I think that letting the state be the focus of authority on marriage is misguided anyway, for gays and religious alike (and everyone else for that matter), so if a liberal state sanctions it, I'm totally cool with it, I don't care.



As for my blasphemous writing against Our Lord and Savior, no worries, Obamassiah will cast the demons out of me if he wins the election, and I won't have to think for myself ever again.  Blessed be His Name, Amen.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 01:34 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Lindsey Grahamnesty's Approval Numbers Take a Nosedive

Pwn3d!


I can't wait to see this punk lose his seat.

I could write more, but Its Friday, and I'm lazy.  Maybe later.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 01:57 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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"Oh My God, This Movie Sucks."

Richard Roeper says about the new crapfest Evan Almighty.  Sounds like Roeper's reaction to the movie is funnier than the movie.  He also notes that Jim Carrey has a way of dodging shitty sequels, three in particular, Dumb and Dumberer, Son of the Mask, and now Evan Almighty.  And man, they were shitty movies, when you can look at a movie's commercials and know its gonna suck, you know thats a bad sign.


Yeah, alright, its a slow news day, Eat Me!

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 12:59 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Stuckey From Stuckey Busted For Blunt While Asking Cop For Directions

Heh.

This guy got busted for marijuana possession while he was asking for directions because he had a blunt behind his ear.  Dumbass.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 09:49 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Retarded Leftist Students Interrupt Schoolboard Meeting, Stage a Die-In

And the Impotent retards of the schoolboard end the meeting and finish it in private.  Michelle Malkin asks if there are any grownups left in Seattle...no, there isn't.

They were bitching about military recruiters, because that's what leftist tools do.  Just remember, these are the assholes who think they're entitled to healthcare and a bunch of other entitlements, paid for by you.  These are the same assholes that burn flags and effigies of soldiers and spew hatred everywhere.  These are the same assholes who want to weaken and undermine the nation, these are kids hardwired to hate and destroy.  Some people have a hard time taking them seriously, and dismiss the behavior as youthful ignorance, I however believe they must be taken seriously.

Maybe its because I'm not much older than they are, and I know that many of them will never shake this behavior.  I've met enough kids like this to know better, I've seen young children that are more animal than human, they become wired this way in the education system, and that wiring is very complicated to untangle, if its at all possible.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 11:32 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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