Scandalous!

It's comforting to know that even in these troubled times, people can still find petty, stupid shit to complain about:

Passengers are angry about being forced to fly on a new Southwest Airlines plane featuring a bikini-clad model, saying it is "soft porn" and is offensive to families.

Israeli supermodel Bar Refaeli, currently dating actor Leonardo DiCaprio, is pictured lying seductively in a revealing white bikini along the length of the Boeing 737 as part of a promotional deal with Sports Illustrated.

The latest addition to the US-based airline was unveiled this month and is deployed like other aircraft in the fleet, servicing all its routes.

The airline has received a flood of criticism on its corporate blog about the promotion, with many passengers complaining about having to board an aircraft “covered in pornography”.

Click on the link to see a photo of this scandalously smutty and sinful pornographic plane. That is, if you aren't afraid of having your very immortal soul damned straight to hell for all of eternity.

Posted by: Sean M. at 09:17 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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Further proof that I am the dumbest person alive

I just sent out a good chunk of money today to reserve an apartment in DC, even though I don't yet have a job there. 

I then took a nap and woke up to this news.

In a few short weeks, it's likely that I will be the first-ever Moron who is also a hobo.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 03:37 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Barney Gumble Syndrome?

British woman has been belching uncontrollably for two years straight.  In two strongly worded letters, Al Gore and James Hansen have demanded the British government monitor the levels of methane she has been releasing as a result of her condition. 

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 12:19 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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GM could go bankrupt

According to their independent auditor.  They're going to have to undergo a major restructuring if they have any chance of avoiding Chapter 11.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 10:14 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Geez, David Brooks Must Have Been Threatened With Exclusion At The Next Cocktail Party

I mean, just a day or so after admitting that he is disillusioned by Obama, he goes back to supporting him.

Sure enough, he admits to meeting with several members of Team Hope And Change since the article was published. And what tune is he singing now?

Fifth, the Obama folks feel they spend as much time resisting liberal ideas as enacting them. The president resisted union pressure and capped pay increases for government workers. He resisted efforts to create mandatory veterans’ health benefits. The administration plans to tackle the suspiciously large increase in the number of people claiming disability benefits.

Oh, picking on cripples. Way to go!Wait! There's More!

I didn’t finish these conversations feeling chastened exactly. The fact is, after years of economic growth, the White House still projects perpetual deficits of more than $500 billion a year. That’s way too much, especially with the boomers’ retirements looming. Moreover, Congress will likely pass the spending parts of the budget and kill the revenue parts, like the cap-and-trade energy tax and the limits on itemized deductions, thus producing much, much bigger deficits.

Yeah, and I still fit into my size 30 pants from college.

Plus, I’m still convinced the administration is trying to do too much too fast and that the hasty planning and execution of these complex policies will lead to untold problems down the road.

Oh, I see. Obama's problem is that he cares and tries too much.

Nonetheless, the White House made a case that was sophisticated and fact-based. These people know how to lead a discussion and set a tone of friendly cooperation. I’m more optimistic that if Senate moderates can get their act together and come up with their own proactive plan, they can help shape a budget that allays their anxieties while meeting the president’s goals.

Yeah. I guess "I won" is sophisticated and friendly. As for proactive moderates, it's not as though they were very strident in opposing the Spendulus, so how much you want to wager they will not stop anything else?

 Sigh. I guess Brooksie  was threatened with having his invitations to Sally Quinn's parties revoked.

Posted by: eddiebear at 09:22 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Where Is Moron Pundit?

If anyone wants to pay me lots of money so I can get the fuck out of my current work situation that would be great. 

Anyway, if anyone was wondering why I'm not swearing and drawing penises lately its because work has placed unreasonable deadlines on a large project and I'm eating, sleeping and breathing work right now. 

I think I'm going to do a collage of "conservatives" that were surprised that Obama was a liberal this week.  That should be pretty awesome.  I bet I could do one of those collages that looks like a picture made of thousands of pictures.  You know, it could be a facecock comprised of hundreds of other facecocks.  

It would be my magnum opus. 

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 09:05 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Olivia Munn+ Sailor Moon + Bone Thugs...

...equals HAWT. 



Though I'm pretty sure the third part of the equation could have been left out and we would have come up with the same result.  And I know you were told there would be no math here, but I'm fairly certain you'll give me a break.

Posted by: Sean M. at 03:55 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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300,000 Hits

I want presents.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 12:43 AM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
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I don't know much about golf...

...but I'm pretty sure it's not supposed to look like this:

Posted by: Sean M. at 11:28 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Seems unnecessary

A couple of weeks ago, my brother mentioned hearing something about how Obama had a hairstylist flown in from Chicago to cut his hair. "Naw," I said, "you must have heard wrong. It's probably Michelle Obama's stylist. After all, how hard can it be to cut Barack Obama's hair?" Yes, yes, I know, I'm a RACIST! And I'm also wrong, it turns out:

Zariff says he is still Obama's barber, and has reportedly been flown from Chicago to Washington to cut the president's hair.

As I have just pointed out, I've been mistaken before, but, um, it basically looks like he has someone run some clippers through his hair every week or two. Couldn't he find a guy in DC who could do that? 

And, yeah, I know...RACIST!

Posted by: Sean M. at 09:44 PM | Comments (12) | Add Comment
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Does anyone else have a problem with this?

In an article about how Obama and Sheriff Pluggy are backing the Employee Free Choice Act (aka Card Check, aka Banning Secret Ballots), I noticed this little nugget:

Before the inauguration, AFL-CIO President John Sweeney said he'd been to the White House only once in the past eight years. Now he visits at least once a week.

Well, that's just great. I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm sure going to sleep better from now on, knowing that a union boss like Sweeney has such easy access to the president.

Posted by: Sean M. at 08:59 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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more housing stuff

Read it and weep.

I am officially at the shut the fuck up you selfish jackasses point. Srsly. That little article is a treasure trove of narcissism, displays of entitlement mentality and some very very scary hints of what's to come. For example, there's this:

Paul Willen, a senior economic adviser at the Federal Reserve Bank of Boston, cited another group not helped by the plan: the newly unemployed.

This is not mentioned in the article but that sounded all kinds of alarms to me. I've had the sneaking suspicion that mortgage payments for the unemployed is just around the bend. Maybe I'm being a paranoid conspiracy theorist, but I see comments such as the above as laying the ground work for precisely that.   After all, we want people to move and get jobs right?  And people shouldn't have their dreams crushed because those evil people in the financial markets destroyed the housing market right?  Honestly, I would not be surprised in the slightest if straight up cash payments is the next step.

And this guy?  I want to punch in the face.

For Mark Klepper, 50, who lives in Miami, buying a big house was a way to establish credit to start a business. In 2004 he bought a home for $585,000, and watched its value rise to $1.4 million. After refinancing twice, he owes $1,064,000. But the home is now worth a little more than he paid for it, and his income has fallen by 40 percent. He stopped paying his mortgage in January. If he were to continue paying, he said, the drain would crush his business. The government’s plan does not help him.

“I feel if there’s a plan out there, there shouldn’t be a limit,” Mr. Klepper said. “If the government is helping these lenders, they need to take some principal write-downs.”

He asked his lender to reduce his balance to $600,000 and his rate to 4 percent, but so far has made no headway.

In less than five years he refinanced twice and nearly doubled his principal amount.  And now he wants a do over?  And I have to pay for it?  Yeah, no.

Going Galt is looking better by the second.

Posted by: alexthechick at 08:58 PM | Comments (12) | Add Comment
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I've cracked the code

Everything Debbie Schlussel does online follows a pattern:

1. Say ridiculous things, call people morons, etc.

2. Use your next post/column to call everyone who disagrees with you deranged.

Seriously, Andrew Breitbart, I love me some Big Hollywood, but why do you link someone who hates everything?

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 02:19 PM | Comments (15) | Add Comment
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fine fine

Fine, fine, the markets are tanking, the FDIC is going broke, I'm getting blisters from my new shoes and Obama figures bankrupting the county is just the thing to get nationalized healthcare. Fine.

Let's focus on the important here.

New Wolverine trailer.  *clears throat*

DEADPOOL DEADPOOL DEADPOOL holy hell how so hot Ryan how so hot

Also I love Liev.  I'm not sure why, I just do. 

Posted by: alexthechick at 02:11 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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A Long Distance Toast To The Steelers!

Source

Posted by: eddiebear at 12:41 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Can you say bank run?

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 12:26 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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In An Example Of Utter Bullshit, War Hero Denied Gun Permit

Because he was too truthful.

"I was trusted by the {federal} government to carry a loaded weapon, but now I am not allowed to purchase one by my local government," he said.

Mechaley, 32, has received counseling for post-traumatic stress disorder related to his service in Iraq. While completing an application for a gun permit, he responded "yes" to a question that asked whether he was being treated for a mental disorder.

"I circled yes because I wanted to be completely honest," he said.

As explanation, he wrote "PTSD from Iraq Marine combat veteran" on the form.

Mechaley's application on Jan. 10 was rejected, he was told, because of that answer.

After talking with police, Mechaley said he had been "too truthful" on the application.

He started to research gun-permit laws and applications and concluded that Omaha's permit application was overly vague on its mental-disorder question.

"If I was actually mentally defective, it would have shown up on the (National Criminal Investigation Service) background check when I purchased my hunting rifle."

What the permit form should ask, he said, is whether the applicant has ever been pronounced mentally impaired or has been committed to a mental institution.

"That's what the (Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives) form asks, and that's a valid point," he said. "I feel the form at the Omaha Police Department is too broad and misses the point of our laws."

A psychiatry professor at the University of Nebraska Medical Center said, however, that having guns on hand could be too big of a risk for some with severe cases of PTSD.

Dr. Carl Greiner said he wasn't familiar with Mechaley's case and couldn't comment on it.

In general, he said, "There would be some specific instances where I would be concerned about someone owning a handgun because of public safety issues."

Using alcohol or drugs to deal with PTSD is a sign of potential trouble, Greiner said.

"That could result in lowered impulse control and the person might be more likely to use a gun," he said.

A gun permit also shouldn't be allowed when someone suffering from PTSD has a history of violence upon awakening, Greiner said.

"If that were the case and someone wanted to keep a handgun under their pillow, it could be a risk to family, friends and others," he said.

Many veterans suffer from PTSD, said Dr. Ahsan Naseem, director of the Lincoln post-traumatic stress disorder clinic of the Veterans Affairs Nebraska-Western Iowa Health Care System.

"It would be uncommon for a combat veteran to not be affected by combat, which is not to say that each combat veteran would suffer from PTSD," he said.

Again. This is utter bullshit.

Posted by: eddiebear at 10:36 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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The tyranny of NICE

Britain's socialist health care regime bans a cancer inhibition treatment for women facing a virulent form of breast cancer, as well as one for a rare form of stomach cancer because of the cost.  If you give the government power over your health, it will put a price on the value of your life, and it will decide on a much lower price than you're worth. 

You're not bringing this to our shores, Obama, no fucking way.  This is why we've got to fight to the last man when the Democrats move to try and nationalize health care.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 10:14 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Boosting the Philly Police Department

Kinda nice thing, folks in Philly are trying to offer a show of support for the Philly PD, while Geno's is again donating a days profits to a worthy cause, this time to the families of fallen officers.  Fellow moron and Philly detective Wyatt can tell you this has been a pretty rough year for the Philly Police Department, having lost several officers to violent career criminals, and are now facing budget and staffing cuts to add insult to injury.  So if you're in Philly for some reason, maybe treat yourself to a cheesesteak and wear something bright blue today. 

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 09:34 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Deathmatch: Levin vs. Frum

Two men* enter, one man leaves.  Guess which one leaves.

*Yeah, I know it's a stretch to call David Frum a "man."

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 01:14 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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