CNN: You Republicans thinking about winning in 2010? Forget it!

The Deciders have decided.  2010 is another hopeless year for Republicans, so we shouldn't even try to win!

These memes don't build themselves, people!

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A View from My Window, non-Trig Truther edition

Just so you know, I've been trapped in my apartment since Monday night.



Ice storms are fun, indeed.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 01:40 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Who could have possibly seen this coming?

It turns out that a bunch of the money in the Obama stimulus package isn't really meant to stimulate the economy, but is, instead, going to inject cash into a bunch of liberal pet projects.

No, really?

(h/t)

Posted by: Sean M. at 11:37 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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As God As My Witness, I Thought Turkeys Wouldn't Form Gangs

Apparently, some postal route in Kennedy Land is under attack from gangs of wild turkeys.

Nearly every day over the last five months, an average of 10 turkeys — led by a pair of male "ring leaders" — have been chasing and attempting to peck a postal worker on his route along Marmion Way and South Street.

Rockport Post Office Delivery Manager Tim Russell said slippery sidewalks and territorial dogs are common challenges for his carriers, but over the 22 years he's worked for the U.S. Postal Service, he's never seen anything quite like this.

"Some of the neighbors said their dogs have been attacked, but mostly it's just been our postal truck," Russell said. "They chase the truck down the street — two males in particular — it's just unbelievable."

The local post office stopped delivering mail to several South Street homes after an incident Jan. 15 when a number of passers-by stopped to help the postal worker as he was being chased by the quick-trotting turkeys.

"Last week, people had to intervene so (the mail carrier) could get back to his truck," Russell said yesterday. "He was trying to wave a bag full of mail at the turkeys as he ran when some folks pulled over to shoo the turkeys away."

For weeks prior to the incident, Russell said the mail carrier had tried to park the truck out of sight or change the time of day he was delivering the mail to that area, but nothing worked.

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Leave It To Alaska To Bring Teh Awesome!

 Mobile bars on buses!

If the liquor license is approved, it will be the first of its kind in Alaska, according to an official with the Alcoholic Beverage Control Board.

Tylan Martin said his four-month-old business, the Pub Line, is “squeaking along,” and he wants to sell alcohol to satisfy current customers and attract new shuttle users.

“That’s a big thing that I keep getting from people: ‘It’s a party bus. Why aren’t we allowed to drink in here?’” he said.

The 28-year-old, who also works as a firefighter and substitute teacher, charges $5 to transport weekend revelers between the Red Fox Bar & Grill, the University of Alaska Fairbanks Pub, The Marlin, Club Alaskan, the Midnite Mine, Kodiak Jack’s, the Big I, the Boatel Sleazy Waterfront Bar and the Oasis Restaurant and Lounge. Riders can pay $15 for an all-night pass.

The shuttle runs from 9 p.m. to 3 a.m. on Friday and Saturday nights and Martin said he drops off customers to their doorstep, provided they live along the route. The shuttle also makes end-of-the-night stops at Fort Wainwright Army Base’s main gate.

On the company’s Web site, www.alaskapubline.com, Martin emphasizes that his rates are cheaper than a taxi.

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Anybody Have A Spare Cow Lung Laying Around?

Just asking. Apparently, such fine pieces of carrion are good bait for alligators stuck in drain pipes.

Trappers are trying to lure the 8 foot alligator out of the pipe with their secret weapon, a rotten piece of meat.

"It's a rotten cow lung. It's stinky, bloody and it floats," said Tracey Hansen with the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission.

Construction crews noticed the gator in the storm drain Monday.

"It's a drain, he could have been walking down the street and just slid in," said Hansen.

Posted by: eddiebear at 09:48 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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USA: Communists Welcome

In case nobody else has been watching USA, they've been doing a series of 'commercials' since the inauguration that make me want to saturation nuke their headquarters. 

One of them is just public fellatio of the One while others profile "artists" like the dipshit who painted this piece of shit.

I am inclined to never watch their network again but then I am reminded that most everyone in the industry is just as euphorically retarded. 

Dear 52, go fuck yourself.  Love, 48.  We'll be waiting.  Don't screw it up.

P.S. - If you've noticed my absence, I'm in the middle of a very massive project at work with a very ridiculous deadline so I'm pretty much out of commission.  Don't worry, I'll be drawing cocks on people's faces (and soon, one I've famously avoided...) and yelling profanities at my monitor in no time.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 08:16 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Stay classy, Radio Shack

Everybody's go-to store for those tiny batteries that power garage door openers is passing out free voodoo dolls in hopes that soccer fans can use them against their hated rivals during a World Cup qualifying match. What's the big deal about a silly little promotion like that? Well...

An advertisement in the sports daily Record on Tuesday invited fans to clip coupons and redeem them at their local Radio Shack store for a voodoo-doll likeness of a U.S. player. The hope was that a little black magic might help Mexico break a decade of futility on the road versus its northern neighbor.

"Help end the losing streak so Mexico advances," the ad read.

An illustration showed a pair of scissors slicing off the leg of a doll in a U.S. jersey that was bruised, crying out in pain, leaking stuffing, and stuck with pushpins.

And, yes, Radio Shack is (ostensibly) an American company. Boycott, anyone?

Posted by: Sean M. at 01:40 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Is It Just Me, Or Is Some Coordination Going On In The Media?

Remember back in 2000, when almost all of the deciders starting talking about Dick Cheney and "gravitas" all at the same time?

Well, I almost wonder if another batch of coordination is going on in the more diseased parts of the media. Remember the Kos "Townhouse" system of sending out talking points to various bloggers, resulting in virtual unanimity of thought? I almost wonder if a "Townhouse" system is now in place, where the more unstable members of the media parrot the same lines on the air in support of The Messiah.

My proof? Proof? Who needs proof?


more...

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I'm sure this will be effective

A petition to tell big bad Rush Limbaugh how much he hurt your widdle feewings.

Stand strong against Rush Limbaugh’s Attacks — sign our petition, telling Rush what you think of his attacks on President Obama. We’ll send Limbaugh your comments.

I'm guessing talking to Rush about your bruised feelings will be about as effective as talking to Iran about their nuclear program.  And I'm still stymied by why the libtards are so threatened by conservative radio that they're up in arms over every little thing that's said.

If any of you send a coded message to Rush, please post it in the comments so we can all laugh at it too.

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The forgotten victims

The new Age of Obama has been tough on a lot of us, but there's one group of poor, downtrodden souls who haven't received much attention—liberal political cartoonists who are having trouble ridiculing The One:

After poking fun at George W. Bush for eight years — often drawing him with big ears and a severe overbite, or as a gung-ho Joe College type, or simply as a clueless doofus — political cartoonists are finding Barack Obama a more elusive target.

Bush's emotive facial expressions, easy-to-caricature physical features and, most of, all his deeply unpopular political decisions were fodder for liberal-leaning cartoonists. But the cool and detached Obama enters the White House at a time of considerable economic anxiety, bolstered by wishes of goodwill even from some political opponents.

"I had all my villains in place for eight years and they've been taken away," lamented Pulitzer Prize winner Pat Oliphant, one of the most widely syndicated cartoonists. "I don't know that I've ever had this experience before, of a president I maybe like. This is an antagonistic art. We're supposed to concentrate on finding things wrong. There's no point in drawing a cartoon that's favorable."

Awwwww. Doesn't your heart just bleed for the poor dears? No? Well, frankly, mine doesn't either.  Fuck 'em.

Posted by: Sean M. at 09:33 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Why I don't take lessons in leadership from the House GOP

Rep. Phil Gingrey (R-GA) takes the bait from The One, and assists him with his attempts to "pick the target, freeze it, personalize it, and polarize it."

[doubleplusundead]  Looks like the Democrats are ahead in implanting spines in the GOP leadership race.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 07:10 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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What's In YOUR Wallet?

When I came home from work last night, I flipped on the news and saw this live confirmation of Tim Geithner as Treasury Secretary. The way the audience reacted you would have thought Geithner just gave the State of the Union address. It made me ill.

However, I was stunned when I began reading the vote in the Senate. Cornyn (R-TX)? Corker (R-TN)? Shelby (R-AL)? YES!??? I cannot believe that Geithner's tax cheating was dismissed as no big deal. It is insulting to every taxpayer in this country. Outrage doesn't begin to describe my reaction. Confirming him is the equivalent of confirming Ray Nagin as the head of FEMA. What were they thinking?

So I've been sulking all day about this, letting the reality of this sink in and then I read this. (I must be a glutton for punishment.)

In an age of bailouts, Geithner is the original Bailout Czar. It was Geithner, after all, who was the instrumental figure in arranging JP Morgan’s takeover of Bear Stearns, a deal in which $29 billion of taxpayer money was pledged as a backstop against illiquid and toxic assets.

It wasn’t Hank Paulson, but rather Tim Geithner who put together the plan to have the government rescue AIG, to the tune of $85 billion and growing.

It has been widely noted Geithner was in favor of stepping in with taxpayer dollars to save Lehman Brothers. I guess it’s pretty easy to spend taxpayer dollars when you aren’t even paying your own taxes.

Do you hear that sound? It's the sound of what is left of your money being ripped from your wallets to pay for a nationalized banking system courtesy of the same man that certain Republicans thought just made a simple mistake on his taxes.

So perhaps a new movement is in order. Instead of sending bricks or bags of tea to Congress as a sign of revolt, perhaps we should start mailing them empty wallets that have an enclosed note that says "THIS is what's in my wallet, you thief!"

Meanwhile, I'm thinking of just ordering a bunch of these name tags to wear every day for the next four years.  What do you think? Appropriate?

Posted by: conservativebelle at 05:48 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
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One New Way To Earn A Mistrial

Smear stuff on your attorney.

The prosecutor said the defendant was compliant after the outburst and was taken into custody without further incident.

After lunch, Fraser dismissed the jury, telling them McGowan would have to get a new lawyer and that his trial would be delayed.

The judge scheduled a status conference for Feb. 9 and raised the defendant's bail from $250,000 to $1 million, finding he is a danger to the community.

Lawson said McGowan originally became upset last week when he claimed one of the jurors saw him in shackles as he entered the courtroom. Fraser dismissed all jurors who saw the defendant in shackles, the prosecutor said.

"The judge had been very fair," Lawson said. "All jurors who saw it were dismissed."

Fraser had also denied McGowan's attempt to represent himself, saying the request was untimely, Lawson said.

The prosecutor said the defendant had previously wiped human feces on himself and was examined by doctors to ensure he was mentally competent to stand trial.

McGowan is charged with kidnapping for robbery, assault with a deadly weapon and other counts and could face assault charges in connection with the attack on his attorney and jury, Lawson said.

The prosecutor said the defendant hit a man with a rock in a sock as the victim came out of his home to investigate a commotion on Oct. 17, 2007.

Posted by: eddiebear at 05:33 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Nebraska Mom Living The Moron Lifestyle

Nice to see she can control the flow of alcohol in her house.

When officers arrived at 1:30 a.m., Flood said they found 22 minors ranging in age from 15 to 20 and two kegs of beer purchased by Beckner. Flood said all 22 minors received citations for MIP and inmates of a disorderly house.

Beckner was cited and released for maintaining a disorderly house, 22 counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor, and two charges of keg registration violation for tearing the registration tags off of the kegs.

Officer Flood said there was so much alcohol in the home that the breathalyzers used by officers recorded a .03 just from the air within the residence.

Posted by: eddiebear at 04:38 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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I'm not smart: Does this mean that the 'Cuda has already filed for 2012?l Update

Link here.

Update: Someone on Twitter writes:

The entry is a result of registering a PAC to pursue a candidacy for Palin. She wouldn't have to be, and isn't, involved.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 03:55 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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It's hard being a lackey for a Marxist mass-murderer these days

Benicio del Toro was doing an interview about Che for the Washington Times and got his little feelwings huwt when it wasn't the puff piece he thought it was going to be:

"I'm getting uncomfortable," Benicio del Toro said after fielding a question about his new movie's portrayal of the Bolivian and Cuban revolutions. "I'm done. I'm done, I hope you write whatever you want. I don't give a damn."

With that, the Oscar-winning actor walked away, abruptly terminating an interview conducted late last week to discuss director Steven Soderbergh's "Che."

Awwwww.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 02:49 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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Equal Protection Clause in Massachusetts = Comedy Gold

A Democrat state senator in Massachusetts got arrested in June 2008 for "annoying and accosting people of opposite sex."  While there are four witnesses to the act, Jim Marzilli still plead not guilty.  Why?  The law is sexist and violates the equal protection clause.  If Marzilli were a woman, he couldn't be charged under this act. 

Sounds crazy right?  Well, it would be in a state that didn't find that a rule defining marriage as between two members of the opposite sex was a violation of equal protection. 

Oh, and the strangest part?  He's tagged as a Democrat the third paragraph into the story. 

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 02:19 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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CudaPAC

Word is that the 'Cuda herself is starting a political action committee:

"SarahPac will support local and national candidates who share Gov. Palin's ideas and goals for our country," says the PAC’s Web site, which promises that Palin will be "a strong voice for energy independence and reform."

The PAC does not yet appear to be registered with the Federal Election Commission, according to an online search of the FEC database. But a spokesperson for the committee confirmed that Palin is behind the group and said it was registered on Monday evening. The Web site went live on Tuesday morning and is already soliciting donations.

"The PAC is a smart thing to do because she’s getting so many speaking requests still, so if she gets a request from, say, Bob McDonnell in Virginia, she could do that travel out of her PAC money,” explained the spokesperson, who noted that Palin has been in high demand from Republicans around the country since the campaign ended.

For those of us wondering how Palin would stay in the limelight while being up in Alaska, this appears to be the answer.  It's definitely a better option for her than joining the Maverick in his Country First PAC. 

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 01:53 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Welcome Chairman Nancy

Or, in what seems to be her native language, 欢迎主席南希.

During his regular “Question of the Hour” segment on Monday’s Situation Room, CNN commentator Jack Cafferty compared House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s idea to spend hundred of millions of dollars on contraception as a cost-reducing measure to the oppressive birth control policies of the Chinese Communists under Mao: “What exactly did she mean? Are the millions of dollars for contraception supposed to stop people from having babies? [That’s] starting to sound a little like Chairman Mao.”

The commentator began his 5 pm Eastern hour “Cafferty File” segment by describing President Obama’s proposed stimulus package, and how this past weekend, “lawmakers were out on their soap boxes. Democrats were selling the plan. Republicans were pointing out problems with the plan.” He then addressed Speaker Pelosi’s comments to George Stephanopoulos on This Week: “On ABC, the House speaker, Nancy Pelosi, defended hundreds of millions of dollars in the stimulus package earmarked for contraception. She said family planning reduces costs and explained that the stimulus plan includes assistance to states, and part of that includes children’s health and education. That includes contraception, which Pelosi said will, ‘reduce costs to the states and to the federal government.’”

When the government pays for every aspect of your life, the government expects to control every aspect of your life.  Anyone who thinks they should get a free ride from the government and then doesn't expect the government to step in and tell them how many kiddos they should have is less aware of what they're getting themselves into than my six-year-old.

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