Baseball Hall of Famer George Brett lets us know he handles his bathroom "duties" in a dignified manner.

George Brett regales a teammate about the many times he's shit his pants. Seriously; Brett goes into great detail about this, and even at one point follows the poor guy across the field so that he can finish his story. At one point Brett says proudly: "I'm good twice a year for that. When's the last time you shit your pants?" America needs to know just how close it came to this being the subject of Brett's Hall of Fame induction speech.

Posted by: eddiebear at 06:28 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Probably, but to just pin the collapse of the financial industry on him is unfair.  Presidents past and Congress have also pushed the industry to give mortgages and loans to people who lacked the means to pay for those loans.  What the fuck did they think was going to happen?  Of course, the political class is just going to demagogue or dig us into a deeper hole than we're already in...

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 06:11 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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One of my newest pet peeves is having people declare that I'm not "fair minded" or "able to think independently" because my political positions are based on a guiding political philosophy, rather than however I feel at any particular moment.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 03:02 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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A leading civil-rights organization spoke out today against "the ongoing crusade" in the United States and warned that unless corrective actions are immediately taken "the future will be bleaker than at any time in the past two hundred years."
 
The American Association for the Protection of Strawmen (AAPS) issued a statement today that they were very concerned about the direction of the presidential election.
 
"Things usually get heated around this time of year," the statement said.  "But since the conventions, our offices have seen a surge in attacks on Strawmen.  Since John McCain announced his VP nominee, over six thousand strawmen per day have been tortured and murdered.  We are particularly concerned by reports that both campaigns have been caught abducting strawmen from their homes."
 
The AAPS took the unusual step of naming several leading suspects in the ongoing attacks on Strawmen.  "Particularly reprehensible has been the behavior of some so-called 'Mainstream Media' figures, who have killed four or five strawmen per show over the past few weeks.  We estimate that Keith Olbermann, Daily Kos, and Time magazine are responsible for at least 10% of all Strawman-related violence."
 
A spokeswoman for the AAPS urged Americans of all political stripes to set aside their hostility for strawmen.  "It's time that we realize that strawmen are just like us, with hopes and dreams for the future, and we should allow them to realize those dreams without living for fear that someone will jerk them up and destroy them in front of a howling, frenzied crowd without any regard for logic or reason." 

Posted by: plebian at 02:57 PM | Comments (12) | Add Comment
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Posted by: plebian at 02:53 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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But of course!  Conservative women are just brainless empty vessels.  If they actually had the ability to reason and think, they'd be liberal, or at least pro-choice!

On an, um, totally unrelated note, I've been thinking I need to pick up a copy of Rules for Radicals.  Know thine enemy and all that.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 01:59 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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Rather than go through a recount process, Sean Parnell has conceded the primary election to Rep. Don Young (links in the original):

"If I thought there was anything wrong, inappropriate or unprofessional about the way this election tally was conducted, I would not only call for a recount, I would demand one," Parnell said. "But that is not the case here."

Events in the presidential contest may have diminished his incentive to keep fighting for the House seat. With Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin now the GOP's vice presidential nominee, Parnell is in position to become governor if the Republican ticket prevails. In a statement, Parnell noted that his current "responsibilities are heightened even more with the exciting possibility" that Palin could become vice president.

I'll have to admit that since the selection of Sarah Palin as John McCain's running mate, I have thought that it was less likely that Sean Parnell would ask for a recount.  If Palin ascends to the Vice Presidency, Alaska will need to keep at least one reform-minded leader behind.  And, while this makes it more likely that Democrat Ethan Berkowitz will win in November, he is pro-drilling in ANWR and has to be more ethical than Don Young.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 11:14 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Some guy living in Michigan must have been trying to forget that he did indeed live in Michigan. How else could you explain this activity?

Police received a report about 12:30 p.m. that a naked man was sitting on a milk crate [was it biodegradeable?-ed.] behind buildings in the 300 block of West Ann Street. Police found the man, who was shirtless and had his pants down around his ankles. He had a beer in one hand and was masturbating with the other while leaning over a pornographic magazine, reports said [multitasking. I like it.-ed.].

The officer arrested the 50-year-old Ypsilanti man for indecent exposure and charges are pending.

Bastards.

But, I guess had he left the beer behind, everything probably would have been kosher.

Posted by: eddiebear at 08:35 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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If feminism has taught us anything, it's that it's sexist to view women as hysterical creatures who are governed strictly by their emotions. No, women are strong. They're unflappable. There's nothing that can rattle a strong woman. Well, almost nothing...

"All of my women friends, a week ago Monday, were on the verge of throwing themselves out windows," an author and political activist, Nancy Kricorian of Manhattan, said yesterday. "People were flipping out. ... Every woman I know was in high hysteria over this. Everyone was just beside themselves with terror that this woman could be our president — our potential next president."

Posted by: Sean M. at 04:52 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Greasy Joe is asking a Missouri State Senator by the name of Chuck Graham to stand up for a round of applause, which, really, is a nice gesture if you think about it. There's just one problem, though, which I'll reveal below the fold...

more...

Posted by: Sean M. at 02:54 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Suck it, Gang of Twenty!

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 12:22 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Well, if you consider a process that is longer, more expensive, and more complicated than getting married or divorced, then, yeah, it's a piece of cake.

While the process isn't so difficult to navigate, it's by no means easy or cheap. Throughout the process, there are no options. All applicants MUST make at least thrree trips to police headquarters where parking is to say, in the least hard to find. Yes, it's near a Metro, but do you want to take your new gun for a ride on Metro?

All applicants must make at least two trips to Anacostia, where the only licensed dealer is located. Parking isn't an issue, but it's hardly centrally located [yeah, and it's dangerous as hell.-ed.]. All applicants MUST pay $60 in fees to the city, $125 transfer fee to the dealer as well as the cost of passport photos and a notary.

Applicants should budget an extra $200 on top of the price of the gun.

As for the written test, out of 20 questions, I got one wrong. Most of the questions are taken right out of the Firearms Registration Outline that comes in the application packet. I won't give any of the questions here [the first time a reporter held back on information. But I digress.-ed.], but it was much easier than the written test for a driver's license. (I got four wrong on that test recently.)[yeah, and more morons will drive than ever own a legal handgun. Your point again?-ed.]

Posted by: eddiebear at 11:11 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Barack Obama has a message for you. A message about hope. A message about change. A message about being a dick:

"I need you to go out and talk to your friends and talk to your neighbors. I want you to talk to them whether they are independent or whether they are Republican. I want you to argue with them and get in their face," he said.

Posted by: Sean M. at 06:29 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
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Uh.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 04:08 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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Really guys?  You're gonna sit there and bitch about what people are wearing to polling places?  What the hell is wrong with you people?  Seriously?  You've got much larger things to worry about.  I've seen like two or three McCain or McCain/Palin signs up in town, I'm guessing the people found/bought their own and put them up on their own.  The place should be filthy with signs, city I'm in is exactly the kind of place McCain needs high turnout to flip this state in his favor.

I haven't seen or heard you people do anything, and I know there's concerns in other places that you aren't doing jack shit, either.  Are you doing anything for Hackett and Barletta even?  Seriously, what the hell is going on with the PA GOP?

(h/t)

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 03:35 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Posted by: plebian at 01:17 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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No word on who his hair endorsed.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 12:34 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Well, it seems my dreams of watching a shitload of them getting their asses beat by the cops during a drum circle almost came to fruition.

Almost.

...Modes, wearing a large blue plastic barrel drum, got between the two men and began using the drum to push the officer away, police said. Rusk took off running, officers said.

About five minutes later, according to police, Rusk returned to continue cutting the fence. When the officer confronted Rusk a second time, Modes again began pushing the officer with his drum. This time, others joined him, according to police.

The officer held onto Rusk by his shirt, but drummers and their friends helped Rusk take off the shirt to escape, police said. However, Rusk was arrested by another officer as he tried to run away. Modes then lead the crowd as it surrounded the officers, police said.

Meanwhile, police in cars with sirens blazing sped from all sides of town to help. Officers blocked Cathcart street between Cedar Street and Pacific Avenue.

Police established a line between the officers and the protesters, and hauled off Rusk and Modes. Officers then dispersed and left the drummers alone.

California Highway Patrol and Santa Cruz County Sheriff's deputies also were dispatched, but were called back because the scene cleared out.

After the ruckus died down, the drum circle played on, with the smell of marijuana wafting through the air. Those remaining in the parking lot had mixed views on what had just happened.

Too bad no hippies were severely injured. One can always dream, though.

And here is an instructional video on how to deal with them.

Posted by: eddiebear at 11:30 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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The Chief Moron came out swinging against his favorite punching bag yesterday (Content Warning on that link and an explanation about the date here), and I can't blame him, seeing as how Andrew Sullivan dove head-first into the sewer again with the following (no link, as per editorial policy):

A pathological liar simply cannot be trusted to tell the truth about herself, even on a subject as routine as a pregnancy and infant son. I can't believe I'm asking these questions either. But in the absence of any answers, what am I supposed to do?

I know this puts me out of the mainstream of acceptable Washington opinion.

If you really think you now know all you need to know about her, read someone else.

Posted by: Sean M. at 02:16 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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God, I can't wait until this douche finally retires and, hopefully, wiles away the rest of his life in obscurity in some out-of-the-way corner of Nebraska:

Sen. Chuck Hagel of Nebraska on Wednesday became the nation's most prominent Republican officeholder to publicly question whether Sarah Palin has the experience to serve as president.

"She doesn't have any foreign policy credentials," Hagel said in an interview. "You get a passport for the first time in your life last year? I mean, I don't know what you can say. You can't say anything."

Posted by: Sean M. at 01:31 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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