Guess what this is?

Well, what it was, anyway.  The answer is below the fold.




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Posted by: Sean M. at 12:34 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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I've found the problem with Sarah Palin!

She isn't from the same state as the PowerLine guys like Tim Pawlenty is, and she isn't Mitt Romney (as Mitt Romneyness is a quality highly valued  in some circles for his nuanced conservative authenticity). 

Hopefully Gov. Palin can tell us how she's actually a boring mullet-weilding governor who campaigned for state office on a platform diametrically opposed to the stances she currently takes as a vice presidential candidate.  Then we can get the "conservative leaders" fully behind her for the general election. 

If we could find a way to make her more boring and inauthentic, that would help, too.  As it stands now, she's hurting the Republican Party's brand. 

Update: Charles "I'm from Washington, so I know better than you rubes" Krauthammer shows up at Moron Central to register his displeasure.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 10:29 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
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Once again, sorry for the lack of updates

Vintage is on vacation, and I've been busy, and obviously everyone is too.  It happens, so consider this an open thread.  I'll definitely be posting a lot tomorrow, I have off.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 06:45 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Man releases Hostages for beer run

A man in Moline held the Hostages by knifepoint after an argument.  He got thirsty after a few hours and ordered two of the Hostages to get him some beer.

One of the Hostages called police immediately to report the hostage situation, then went to get some beer and ended up traveling cross country to drink the finest beer and eat the best bar grub he could get his hands on. 

The other released Hostage waited until about 2:30AM that night to call police, where they engaged in a lengthy conversation, the dispatcher still isn't quite sure what the hell they were talking about.  Police had resolved the rest of the situation peacefully hours ago, and the hostage taker is awaiting trial. 

Upon release, one of the Hostages, a large, loud, self-proclaimed Man-Lesbian-American stated to reporters,

"I dunno, he was kind of a cool guy, other than the threats, angry rambling and mild stabbing, but it was getting seriously boring in there.  No beer obviously, but there was nothing else either.  Not even any somewhat chunky Eastern European women with gigantic melons.  Hell, I'd take pictures, I usually do," (s)he said with a laugh.  "And no Limp Bizkit, though I would have taken any wretched 90's rap/rock band at that point."  Overhearing the bombastic man-lesbian, one of the other Hostages simply rolled his eyes and walked to his car to go home.

One of the female Hostages said the hostage taker kept asking for her number because he quote, "had a thing for redheads."  She politely declined, despite having a knife angrily waved at her several times.  Another Hostage noted she was happy about the situation, because it kept her from cheating on her new diet, while another wasn't happy with the liberal amount of cursing coming from the hostage taker.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 07:59 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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German Bert & Ernie Rip Off+I'm Really Tired+I Need A Refresher From Politics=My Moment Of Zen

Folks, this is why you should not do drugs.

Posted by: eddiebear at 11:29 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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We can no longer believe in Change^tm

Obama has changed his slogan:

"Change We Can Believe In" carried an implicit contrast with Clinton, who had a trust problem. But it's a basically abstract message as the campaign moves to add flesh to Obama's notion of change.

And so Obama has made a rare tweak, changing the description of the change he's offering.

The new line: "The Change We Need."

Gee, I wonder if this has anything to do with the fact that people are finding out that they don't believe in his change.  Or maybe they realize that people won't "believe" a message of change coming form someone who has been in the U.S. Senate more than half his adult life. 

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 02:24 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Your drunken Joe Biden youtube of the day

I think this is really him.  I can't tell.  But if so, it's pretty well...distinguished. 



I shouldn't talk, though.  His IQ is probably higher than mine.

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 12:19 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Jennifer Lopez: Olympic Athlete

Who would have thought that this massive intellect would have come from the Bronx?  Anyway, here's some celebrity FAIL for your Wednesday night:

Poor Jennifer Lopez. The new mom is training for a triathlon, but everyone is too busy watching the Olympics to notice.

 Lopez, who appeared on "Good Morning America" Aug. 18 to discuss her preparations for the Malibu Triathlon, was overheard saying after the segment that she “couldn’t understand why everyone is talking about that swimmer,” according to a GMA source. “She couldn’t come up with (eight-time gold-medal winner Michael) Phelps’ name, and then she yammered on about how she was the one training for a triathlon just six months after giving birth, and how that was the big story right now, not ‘the swimmer.’ ”

I have to agree with her.  It's not every day a celebrity tries to get attention for something.  Or has a baby.  The 2008 Beijing Olympics is Jennifer Lopez' time, not Michael Phelps'.

Also, how does concentrating on the accomplishments of either of these all-star athletes help Michelle Obama's children?

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 08:25 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Don Young is rEVOLutionary, apparently

Noted cult leader Ron Paul has chimed in on Alaska's GOP House primary.  He's joined noted Christian Democrat Mike Huckabee in endorsing Rep. Don Young:

Paul, the 72-year-old congressman from Texas whose maverick presidential bid drew wide support in Alaska, sent out a letter to his supporters here urging them to vote for Young.

“Don and I have served together in Congress for many years, and I consider him a friend,” Paul wrote in the letter. “Don has been an outspoken voice against environmental extremists over the years and has strongly opposed the types of federal regulatory overreach advocated in the name of environmentalism.”

I'll just sit back and note that there are three GOP candidates in August 26's GOP House primary.  In addition to Young and Lt. Gov. Sean Parnell, state representative Gabrielle LeDoux is running.  Oh yeah, and LeDoux is also running as a libertarian Republican who is against the Iraq War, the Patriot Act, and REAL ID. 

I'm shocked, shocked.  Who would have thought that our beloved Dr. Paul would put friendship and incumbency ahead of principles?

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 12:16 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Presented without context

Mr Xing, described in reports as "lonely and disturbed", told police that he thought it would be fun to have sex with the bench.

A guy who tried to have sex with a bench is "lonely and disturbed?" The hell, you say!  Besides, that bench was just asking for it.

Posted by: Sean M. at 02:39 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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This is, ironically a huge pile of FAIL

The Dallas School District has some...interesting new rules on grading, and some of the teachers aren't very happy about them:

Teachers have derided the new rules as being too lenient on lazy students by requiring teachers to accept late work, give retests to students who fail and force teachers to drop homework grades that would drag down a student's class average.

But [school superintendent] Dr. Hinojosa asked teachers and parents to consider that in the long run the rules will help more students succeed.

"We want to make sure that students are mastering the content [of their classes] and not just failing busy work," he said.

"We want students to get it right, and we want to make sure that they do get it right."

Judging from a list of the new rules, there's no way students can't get it right:

•Homework grades should be given only when the grades will "raise a student's average, not lower it."

•Teachers must accept overdue assignments, and their principal will decide whether students are to be penalized for missing deadlines.

•Students who flunk tests can retake the exam and keep the higher grade.

•Teachers cannot give a zero on an assignment unless they call parents and make "efforts to assist students in completing the work."

•High school teachers who fail more than 20 percent of their students will need to develop a professional improvement plan and will be monitored by their principals. For middle school the rate is 15 percent; for elementary it's 10 percent.

What do you think the result of that last one, especially, is going to be? Are the teachers going to bust their asses to make sure some of their less capable students learn the material and earn a passing grade, or are they just going to pass along those kids to the next grade, where they'll probably understand even less, eventually graduating with worthless diplomas? I'd like to think that at least some of them would make the effort to do the former, but I suspect the latter is a lot more likely.

Posted by: Sean M. at 12:00 AM | Comments (13) | Add Comment
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Wow, there must be a lot of Jews in Georgia...

Who would have guessed that Pat Buchanan would back Vladamir Putin in the Russia/Georgia conflict?

(It's a TownHall.com link, so beware of pop-ups and Family Research Council members.)

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 01:25 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Uh-huh, yeah, I'll bet

Corsi is now trying to back away from his Trutherism, claiming that he was "asking questions", but not agreeing with the conspiracy theorists.  He also says that just because he goes on various nutty radio shows it doesn't mean he agrees with them.  I'll fucking bet. 

All the talk show, talk radio people and bloggers who have promoted this twat and his book should be ashamed of themselves.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 07:53 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Someone left the cake out in the FAIL

I don't know anything about baking, but I know a lot about FAIL, and this blog combines the two in a way that's, well, delicious.  Here's one of my favorites:



(h/t)

Posted by: Sean M. at 04:17 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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May I present to you Mr. & Mrs. Tased Bro

Because it's not a wedding reception until the bride and groom (and several others, actually) get neutralized by the cops. 

(h/t)

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 11:26 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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The 2014 Olympics won't be any better

I was just reminded that they're being held in Russia.  Gee guys, how about we just go ahead and let the Sudan host the 2020 Summer Olympics?  Or maybe Venezuela?

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 12:15 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Maybe he should consider setting up an office in Jersey

I have a strong feeling that our humble host won't be able to resist dropping a certain motivational poster in the comments in response to this here link.

Posted by: Sean M. at 01:03 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Yeah, this guy is bad news

We definitely need to avoid Jerome Corsi like the plague.  Someone put together a video chronicling Corsi's trutherism,

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 09:19 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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One last thing about Jerome Corsi and his book

In one or the other of my two posts last night on The Obama Nation, I meant to tack on an addendum noting that I hadn't read the book and therefore, was not endorsing it.  I just wanted to point out some MSM silliness/shoddiness regarding its release.

Well, now I really wish I had done so.  It turns out Corsi is a jackass Troofer who keeps some really atrocious company (but I repeat myself).  I definitely won't be picking up a copy, seeing as how in my book, someone like that has just about zero credibility.

(h/t)

Posted by: Sean M. at 08:46 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Well, well, well...

I have to laugh at this, in the early days, I noted a segment where Bill O'Reilly did an interview where he promoted Marxist crackpot priest Michael Pfleger.   O'Reilly and Pfleger were both going after a promotion that McDonald's was doing with Twista. 

The thing is, the interview with O'Reilly happened after Pfleger threatened to "snuff out" a gun shop owner.  I always found that pretty hypocritical, you're going to whine about the violence and misogyny of rappers, then ally with a guy who threatens a gun shop owner?  Well, now it seems that Pfleger wants to see O'Reilly's First Amendment rights taken away.  I think they deserve each other.

Posted by: doubleplusundead at 09:30 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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