In a daring dawn attack, over a thousand Taliban militants stormed a provincial prison in Afghanistan and gained entry in a few short minutes.  Once inside, they demanded to be held without trial “until the Americans go away and stop massacring us.”

“We are not in a hurry to get our eternal reward,” said the leader of the militants.  “And it is quite clear that the Americans are not hesitant to drop cluster bombs on us or raid captured villages and kill us like the dogs that we are.  Quite frankly, it’s safer in here, so we’d prefer to stay.”

Not everyone was happy with the mass surrender, though.  One prisoner said “how are we to know that the Americans will not bomb the prison to punish them for breaking in?  I’d prefer that they stayed outside and got slaughtered like proper Mujahdeen.”

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