Barack Obama today surprised reporters by announcing that his running mate will be formerly-retired field general Brett Favre. The move was endorsed by the Green Bay Packers, Favre's current employer, who said they felt he could do more good on a national stage instead of trapped in a frozen wasteland.

"I said that I wanted a vice presidential candidate who had military experience, sound judgment, and impeccable character," said Obama. "In Favre, I get a field general that has proven he can win the big one and whose experience will provide a steady hand in my administration. And I also know that Brett won't be afraid to disagree with me, as he's disagreed with coaches and logic so many times in the past to make risky throws on the field. Sometimes even successfully!"

Obama also said that Favre now makes their campaign more competitive. "Favre, with his Mississippi drawl and resemblance to dollar-bill presidents, will help make our campaign more appealing to those voters who so far have resisted the Obama Glamour: buck-toothed hillbillies, gun-toting bible thumpers, and trailer park trash."

Observers hailed the move as “sheer genius”, with Political Analyst Keith Olbermann calling it "daring in the Obamic style that we have all come to marvel at" and Peter King dubbed it his "ultimate wet dream ticket.”

Not all Democrats were pleased, however. Geraldine Ferraro, former Clinton campaign staffer, complained that "this move just proves that Obama is a misogynistic ageist who ought to borrow Alfalfa's 'Woman Hater's Club' sign to hang out front of INVESCO Field. Their new campaign motto is 'One Penis, One Vote' for all the respect they give women."

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