Injuries and sports go together like dead people voting and St. Louis. I have heard of some rough injuries before, but what happened to Arizona Diamondbacks Catcher Chris Snyder may take the cake.

the Arizona Diamondbacks put left fielder Eric Byrnes and catcher Chris Snyder on the 15-day disabled list on Tuesday. Byrnes is out with a strained left hamstring, Snyder with a left testicular fracture... Snyder left Monday night's game after being hit in the groin area by a foul tip and underwent an MRI on Tuesday. The club put him on the DL about an hour before Tuesday night's game against Milwaukee.

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Friends and acquaintances of retired general Wesley Clark say that they are mystified why the former NATO commander in Europe attempted suicide this weekend.  The General, who had been mentioned by some as a potential running mate for Barack Obama, jumped beneath a speeding bus on Sunday.

On Monday Clark tried again, sneering at danger and leaping beneath the bus a second time.  Those close to the case describe his situation as "grave" and say that his political aspirations are on life support and not likely to live out the week.  It is unclear whether the political suicide was intentional or the result of some kind of mental illness.

One acquaintance expressed dismay at the General's actions.  "Wes was in a good place," she told reporters.  "He'd gotten his life turned around and had finally recovered from his loss in the 2004 campaign, where John Kerry's 'Benedict Arnold' military routine somehow triumphed over his 'Gomer Pyle' military routine.  He's never forgiven the public, saying that since everybody loves Pyle's antics, they should have voted for him in droves, but they didn't."

"I'd never seen him as happy as he's been the past two months," said one of his cousins.  "I spoke to him just the other day, and he said he'd hitched his wagon to a rising star.  Shazam, he said, I finally made it!  Then he goes and jumps under a bus like that.  I really can't understand it."

"I've known Wes for a long time," said another colleague.  "When I saw him on TV on Sunday, he seemed distracted and inartful.  It simply was not the Wesley Clark I knew."

Posted by: plebian at 03:11 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Best part?  The yarmulke spinning off.  Explains a few things, eh?

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 02:02 PM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
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It's old. Very old. But I just heard it (well, the censored version anyway) for the first time ever on Dennis Miller's radio show. It made chortle, guffaw, and look like an idiot because my co-workers had no idea why I was doing either of these things.

This is your official NSFW warning.

Exit question:  Was he drunk or did he just not know it was live?  Or both?

Posted by: It's Vintage, Duh at 10:41 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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