July 20, 2009
Things Alex Should Be Allowed To Write In A Brief
A Non-Exhaustive List:
1. Opposing counsel's argument is as stupid as he is ugly.
2. Dude. Seriously. Dude.
3. Oh COME ON! The Defendant was drunk off his ass, ran a red light and smashed into a little old lady. I kind of think the jury's going to side with us here. Did I mention she was on her way to help run the refreshment stand at the parish picnic when the drunk ran the red light and smashed into her? We're sooooo gonna win.
4. I don't care what the precedent says, the Superior Court was doing the bad monkey crack when it issued that ruling.
5. Why should we win this Motion? Because I said so is why.
This list brought to you by the fact that if I write "it is respectfully submitted" one more time today when I really mean "but they're WRONG and STUPID" I'm gonna snap.
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1. Opposing counsel's argument is as stupid as he is ugly.
2. Dude. Seriously. Dude.
3. Oh COME ON! The Defendant was drunk off his ass, ran a red light and smashed into a little old lady. I kind of think the jury's going to side with us here. Did I mention she was on her way to help run the refreshment stand at the parish picnic when the drunk ran the red light and smashed into her? We're sooooo gonna win.
4. I don't care what the precedent says, the Superior Court was doing the bad monkey crack when it issued that ruling.
5. Why should we win this Motion? Because I said so is why.
This list brought to you by the fact that if I write "it is respectfully submitted" one more time today when I really mean "but they're WRONG and STUPID" I'm gonna snap.
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