January 07, 2009

This Lady Needs To Brush Up On Her Hobo Luring Skills

Look lady, if you really want to lure in the hobo population, beer is not the way to go as it doesn't dull the senses fast enough. That is why Val-U-Rite Vodka or Flavored Everclear is the way to go.

As Lewis was passing out beer to people around 6 p.m. she was told to leave by a police officer working at the location. She ignored his orders, popped open another beer and gave it away, police said.

The officer escorted Lewis out and explained to her the boundaries of the property. The woman continued to pass out beer outside of the building's block wall, police said.

Lewis was detained by police and searched by a female officer. During the search Lewis lunged forward and bit the officer's hand, police said.

But I do give her credit for posing as a "community organizer", or whatever she called herself.

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January 06, 2009

Senator of the Week: Diane Feinstein

First, she criticizes Obama's pick of Leon Panetta to head the CIA.

Now, she's saying that the Senate should seat Roland Burris.

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Rip Torn Is Living The Moron Lifestyle

He was arrested again for a DUI.

Despite two prior drunken driving arrests in New York, Torn may be eligible for an alcohol education program for first-time offenders in this state. He was acquitted by a jury in a 2004 drunken driving case and, in a second case, pleaded guilty in 2007 to a lesser charge of being ability impaired, according to published reports.

“All I can tell you is that we will review the reports and Mr. Torn and I will meet to discuss his defense options. At this point, I don’t know what they are yet,” Waterfall said Monday.

On Dec. 14, a bartender at the White Hart Inn reportedly served Torn, but apparently noticed he appeared intoxicated as he was leaving the establishment, according to a police report. Torn reportedly refused a ride home and got in his 1994 Subaru Legacy with a Christmas tree tied on top and drove away.

Torn was reportedly driving in the break-down lane on Route 44 when he was stopped by State Police Trooper Ray Dungan at 9:35 p.m. Torn’s eyes were bloodshot and the trooper smelled alcohol, he reported. Torn failed a portion of the field sobriety tests before he gave up, claiming the ground was not level enough.

Torn refused to take the Breathalyzer test, according to police. In the cruiser, Torn used profanity, the trooper said.

“He was cooperative,” Waterfall said. “He seems like a nice older gentleman who has had an exceptional career.”

In a video recorded during Torn’s 2004 arrest, the actor was not cordial with police, telling New York officers they were “f--- out of line” and saying that they should “go to hell.”

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I Have No Idea What You Are Saying, So Here's Robocop With Some Fried Chicken

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Snowboarding Meets The Moron Lifestyle

This company in Vermont decided to make snowboarding awesome by putting old Playmate photos on snowboards.

Too bad some people who should just go away are ruining things.

Yet the company has found itself at the center of a grow ing controversy in the liberal state, with residents, students, and politicians debating free speech and sexism on the ski slopes. The Burlington City Council discussed asking Burton to withdraw the boards, and the Girl Scout Council of Vermont is considering taking concerns to lawmakers next month.

The outcry hasn't made a dent in sales of the new lines, Burton cofounder Jake Carpenter told the Burlington newspaper Seven Days in November. The Playboy line, called Love, and a second line called Primo, which depicts mutilated hands, have "completely oversold by virtue of this exposure," he said.

The debate has split Vermonters along a number of lines. There are parents who don't want their children to encounter the images at the state's family-friendly slopes; young snowboarders who cite right to free speech in buying the boards; and politicians who fear the criticism might drive Burton, one of the city's biggest employers with more than 500 Vermont workers, to move its headquarters elsewhere.

Zarrillo's boss, Mark Redmond, said he pulled his nonprofit, Spectrum Youth & Family Services, from a Burton program that donates snowboards to needy children after learning about the Playboy line and Primo, which depicts fingers mutilated by razors, a dog's teeth, and scissors. Because objectification of women increases the chance men will become abusive, he said, the boards are an important issue for both sexes.

"Once you bring something like that to the public domain, it's a public issue," said Redmond, who would like Burton to pull the unsold Love and Primo boards from stores. "Why is it OK for younger children to see it on the slopes or in the lift line?"

Carmel Quinn, who directs the Girl Scout Council of Vermont teen program, said she is talking to the group's teenage members about bringing the issue to lawmakers when the Vermont legislative session resumes this month


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January 05, 2009

Robot bartender!



It's called BaR2D2, and you can find instructions on how to build your own here.

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Why Didn't My Dad Teach Me This?



This is way more useful than teaching me the mascot names for all the NFL teams (NTTAWWT).

Oh, and check out all of McKenzie's other vids.

(h/t to Turtle)

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I Love Hearing About Drinking Games Going Legit!

Beer Pong Championship!

They come wearing matching sweat suits, team t-shirts and sweatbands. Ear buds channel their favorite pump up music right into their ears. Coaches scream advice from the sidelines - looks of joy and horror alternately splayed across their faces. After months of rigorous training, late nights and exhausted mornings - 414 teams have descended on the Flamingo for the pinnacle of competition in their sport: The World Series of Beer Pong.

The three day tournament will award a $50,000 grand prize to the pair of pong players who's accuracy is unrivaled and skill indomitable. As over 800 beer pongers cheered and chugged on Friday afternoon, Weekly spoke to a few of the contenders to see what it takes to take home the win.

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January 04, 2009

Yet Another Mexican Doing The Work Americans Won't Do

Namely, bringing Teh Crazee to new heights.

Mexico's self-proclaimed "Grand Warlock" says the United States will pull troops out of Iraq in 2009 and send them to the border with Mexico in an attempt to expand its territory {hell, we won't send them there to defend our own territory, so why take their land?-ed}.

The prediction from Antonio Vazquez comes with a word of warning though: his record of projecting the future is spotty at best {ahh. He's like a political pollster, I see-ed.}.

Vazquez has been making predictions since 1980 on events ranging from international events to the private lives of celebrities, based on his reading of tarot cards. {and still using more advanced techniques than Zogby-ed.}


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January 02, 2009

My Kind Of Woman!

Looks like she is good at multitasking.

Provo police responded Saturday night before 10 p.m. to a call from neighbors who said a half-naked woman was knocking on their window, according to a police report filed in 4th District Court.

By the time police got there, the woman was in the neighbor's bedroom, now fully naked, police said.

The woman became more agitated and fought with police, lunging and grabbing at officers. She made obscene comments and, during the struggle to get her handcuffed, bit one of the officers on the inner thigh, breaking the skin, according to the affidavit.

Police found the woman's 6-year-old son in her nearby apartment, as well as evidence of a rampage, which included broken pictures, lamps and dishes and a broken bird cage.

Officers found the bird and turned it over to animal control and then removed the child and placed him in the custody of the Division of Child and Family Services for his own protection, the affidavit states.

Below the apartments, officers also located items belonging to the neighbor and to the woman, which they believe she had thrown off the balcony sometime that evening.

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Maybe The Economic Slowdown Does Have Some Advantages

Namely, beer is becoming cheaper in England.

And the even better news is that JD Wetherspoon bosses say the offer will run “indefinitely” at their 713 UK boozers.
 
There will also be price cuts on some bottled ales and lagers and on wines and spirits. A number of meals will be offered for just £2.99. The move comes amid a Goverment drive to stop binge-drinking fuelled by “happy hours” and cheap booze deals. 
But pub trade groups say the clampdown hits ordinary, responsible clients.

And Wetherspoon chief executive John Hutson insisted his company’s move would benefit punters. He said: “We appreciate the economic downturn means they have to be more careful with their cash.
“We believe our new prices will allow people to enjoy visiting a Wetherspoon pub without it costing them too much.

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January 01, 2009

Happy New Year, Scandi Style

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