November 30, 2009

Paint huffer guy trying to quit inhaling

I hope he can quit, I'm amazed the guy is even alive or even remotely coherent, huffing is a pretty deadly addiction.  He notes he was kinda shocked when a rehab director recognized him on the street and told him he was in Maxim, and there were tshirts and other merchandise with his face on them.

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Stealing another idea from the left - Theater of the Oppressed (another in a series of crackpot ideas that occur to me at 0300)

As I have mentioned before after being laid off in January I decided to squander my savings and return to school. (I decided I actually need a degree if I am going to keep working in engineering.) In order to finish my distribution requirements I needed one more Visual Literary and Performing Arts class so I decided to take the only one offered this quarter - Intro to World Theater. Most of the class has been pretty benign although there was some -read lots of - kill whitey stuff in our section on African American theater. Benign until (dramatic pause) THEATER OF THE OPPRESSED.

Developed by Augusto Boal as a tool for stirring up the oppressed masses in Central and South America he intended it to be full on Marxist-Leninist agitprop:

"The theater is a weapon and it is the people who should wield it"
I pointed this out in class, and the instructor to his credit readily acknowledged it, but until I was finishing up my weekly class journal this morning it didn't really hit me - We're people and at the moment I am feeling pretty damned oppressed.   When people on the right (Giles / O'Keefe) started using Alinsky style tactics it got immediate results.  Why couldn't this work also?  Anyone feel like writing a play? 

more...

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For all the Star Wars geeks fans - Call of Duty 4 Galactic Warfare Mod




Well I thought it was cool, and if you don't then you sir are worse than Emperor Palpatine

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November 27, 2009

Stupid question of the day

Does anyone else think that Tiger Woods's wife taking a golf club to his SUV windows might not have been a selfless act of rescue?

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November 26, 2009

In case any of you missed it...

...I've always been something of a history buff, so I put up a meticulously-researched piece on the very first Thanksgiving over at The H2 earlier today.

Go. Read. Learn. And, most importantly, share it with The Children™.

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The Truth About Ace

Gabriel Malor to Inner_Circle

Those asswipes at DPUD want to liveblog with us. I tell you, I will be damned before I let them at our readers or share with them.

I say we just nix the whole thing if it comes to that. I think we can swing that.

Looks like the cat's out of the bag over at the head moron's.

DPUD, we want to live blog with those window lickers?  Hell, without our level-headed, erudite observations keeping them honest they would have jumped the shark long ago.  I mean seriously, Jack M.?  Everyone knows Haiku is vastly superior to Epic Poetry.

But seriously, please let me live blog with you!  PLEASE?  I'm suffocating over here.  I don't know how much more I can take it. 

In closing, I am including a Haiku Eddie wrote me in a brief moment of lucidity:

Dear [YOUR NAME] Fuck You
FUCK YOUR FUCKIN FUCK FUCK FUCKS
Sincerely, Eddie.

He's really an artist.  I'm not worthy to contaminate his pixels with my facecocks.

Update: In all seriousness, I'd like to say I'm thankful to be posting with such a great group of morons.  Its been a great year and a half and I hope we'll make it many more.  Also, I'll be damned if I miss Moronpaloozaconstock so I hope you're all ready to be facecocked in person.

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November 24, 2009

When you've lost Angelina Jolie...

Maybe there is hope for America.

US Magazine: Angelina Jolie not an Obama Fan

"She hates him," a source close to the U.N. goodwill ambassador, 34, tells the new issue of Us Weekly (on newsstands now).

"She's into education and rehabilitation and thinks Obama is all about welfare and handouts. She thinks Obama is really a socialist in disguise," adds the source.

...

she thinks Obama is all smoke and mirrors," the source says.


If Angelina Jolie can spot it why can't the intelligentsia?

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WTF?

So I was updating my Fantasy Football roster when I noticed an ad in the upper left hand corner that, well, defied any logical or non-drug-related explanation.  I present it here as evidence that I'm not going insane.



Umm... what the fuck?

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Mom gives autistic son weed

Since marijuana seems to be an unexpectedly hot topic 'round these parts, I'll drop this little cherry bomb down the toilet...

The CBS morning show profiled a mom who gives her son weed for his autism.

“They’re seeing Joey come out. He’s never made noises. We didn’t even know he could make noise until the first batch of brownies.”

Yeah, I'm not sure about that one either.

Flame on, morons!


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Just For Alex, Deep Sea Edition

You know you want to look.

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November 23, 2009

Haiku

Leave it to the Japanese to invent poetry with rules.

Topic: AGW Hoax Emails

Fuck You, ManBearPig
Too Bad They Don't Sell Lying,
Half-Retard Offsets

Topic: Andrew Sullivan

Get your creamy loads
loving power glutes out my
Country, stoner-boy.

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 11:19 AM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
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November 22, 2009

Wrong on so many levels

I'm going to hell for posting this.

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Sully Loves Pot

And creamy loads, but I digress.

Ever since the dipshit got busted with pot he's been pushing how awesome and great marijuana is constantly on his site.  Today he had some fucking chart showing (among other things) how much tax money we'd make on pot. 

That.  Is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.  I guarantee you we'd make exactly zero dollars on marijuana and, were I the type of person who believes in conspiracy theories, I'd suspect that is the reason it was made illegal in the first place.

Why won't we make any tax money on pot? 

BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T NEED TO FUCKIN BUY IT.

They'll grow their own.  Look, growing marijuana isn't like growing tobacco or even a fucking tomato.  It is not called "weed" for no reason.  That fucking shit will grow anywhere whether you want it to or not.  A few weeks after it was made legal everyone that wanted it would have a fucking forest of the shit in their back yard (leaving aside the likelihood that a serious pot user would own a house...).

Argue that the law enforcement is ridiculous or that it costs too much money but seriously, put the revenue argument away.  Besides the fact that its bullshit, just think how much money we could make if we legalized and taxed prostitution.  Or human slavery?  Just because we could make money is not even remotely a solid argument for it. 

And of course, Sully makes the argument because there is nothing a liberal needs more than to justify his personal behavior through the extension of his proclivities into law. 

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November 20, 2009

Friday Night WTF

This will probably only be funny if you've seen Forgetting Sarah Marshall.  And I'm going to guess that the only people here who've seen FSM are chicks, Vinty, and those men with teeny enough cojones that their wives choose their movies for them.


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(Insert title here)

Okay, I'm officially torn on this. (very annoying ad watch).
According to a military official, detainees at a Wisconsin National Guard camp in Iraq are using Brett Favre as a manner of getting at the guard troops there.
"They know Favre by name," said First Lieutenant Tim Boehnen, who is from New Richmond, Wis.

The soldiers decorated the base in Packer's colors and now the jihadis they're guarding are scoring points on them using Favre.

How should I feel?
On the one hand, it's freaking hysterical. I've been doing the same thing.
On the other hand, it's jihadis doing it. Or at least detainees.
Hmmm, that makes it funny and endy. The Funniest End of Civilization Ever strikes again.

Iowahawk (where I saw this) has some news from the midwest about the reaction.
Green Bay, WI - Like a pot of bratwurst left unattended at a Lambeau Field pregame party, simmering tensions in the strife-torn Midwest boiled over once again today as rioting mobs of green-and-gold clad youth and plump farm wives rampaged through Wisconsin Denny’s and IHOPs, burning Texas toast and demanding apologies and extra half-and-half.

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November 17, 2009

WTF is wrong with Wisconsin, part eleventy billion and four

Even the deer are too stupid to live.

(h/t)

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Keep Your Laws Off My Body

Does anyone else find it ironic that the "keep your laws off my body", pro-abortion crowd is so adamant that the health care bill "put your laws all over my body" bill include funding for abortion?

Once again, the liberal ability to hold conflicting ideas as holy writ defies my ability to comprehend.

Update: Oh, and for the comment spammers...


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November 15, 2009

You, Yes You!

Go read my post over at RWN.

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November 14, 2009

Groovy, man



(Via scottw)

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November 13, 2009

Channeling my Inner Eddie

So I'm reading yet another lamentation on the state of our "special relationship" with the UK, and bemoaning how our president has treated our faithful allies so poorly, and you know what I'm thinking?

Fuck the British.

Fuck the Europeans.

Fuck 'em all.

I've lived in Europe since early 2004.  You can't imagine how shitty these people are about us.  For five years I've listened to how stupid my countrymen are, what a bunch of dark-ages christanist racist pigs we are, and how we've got the most psychotic, stupid, fucked-up leader in the history of world leaders.

Well, guess what we did?  After eight years of being told what a bunch of dickheads we are, we elected somebody we thought Europe (and the world) would approve of.

Turns out he's a narcissistic prick who gets off talking about himself who'll let them all be butchered by Islamists or pushed around by resurgent communists who can't tell his ass from a hole in the ground, but at least he's not from Texas.  Whew!

It's time for the rest of the world to grow the fuck up already.  The president of the United States is there to take care of the US, not the rest of the world.  The real problem here is jealousy, but let's be honest with each other:  if you don't want the US throwing its weight around, try beefing up your military instead of squandering your GDP on more giveaway social programs.

If Obama teaches the rest of the world to get its act together and stop counting on the US to wipe their asses for every little thing, then he'll at least have done one thing right for foreign affairs.  It'll suck that he did it so spectacularly poorly, but still, we'll take what victories we can get.

The world loves the UN because it puts a veneer of responsiblity on their venal selfishness.  They hate the US because unlike them we sometimes get involved in other countries directly and lean on them to change shit.  It's so much more comfortable to just pass another anti-Israel resolution and then go to lunch than to get your boots dirty trying to force barbarians to stop raping women and allow due process under law to all citizens.

But we're willing to do that hard work, so long as while we do it we don't have to listen to the rest of the world bitch and moan and bellyache about how we're so stupid and ignorant and we do everything wrong.

Or at least, we were until we elected their A-number-one boyfriend, who they signalled us was just perfect and the dreamiest hunk they've ever seen.

Well, don't worry.  I'm sure he'll still respect them in the morning.

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