November 29, 2008

"Commemorating the day the world changed forever"

What can you get this Christmas for that special someone who already has everything that's tacky and lame? Oh yeah, this...

Celebrate the victorious election of our 44th President of the United States, America's first African American Commander, with the commemorative plate from the American Historic Societyâ„¢. The Historic Victory Plateâ„¢ is a priceless work of art featuring the triumphant President-Elect surrounded by the American flag and spectacular fireworks celebration. This first collectors issue plate celebrates with the inscription "Change Has Come" scripted in 22K Gold text.
Seeing as how they've apparently had to skimp on editorial services for their website, you can be sure that they've spared no expense on making this the finest ugly piece of crap you'll ever own.


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November 21, 2008

When My 3 Year Old Daughter Plays Princess, It's Cute.

These Japanese ladies? Not so much.

Japan has been famous for its extreme fashion fads, mostly among teenagers. These have ranged from the Lolita look, in which women dress up in baby-doll dresses and bonnets, to a tough-girl look called Yamamba, or mountain hag, which requires a dark tan, white eye shadow and shaggy, silver-bleached hair.

But the princess boom is seen as a more polished and sophisticated look that's popular among working women in their 20s and 30s, perhaps as a bit of escapism from workaday stress and economic uncertainty.

"There's a longing for a happy-ending fairy tale," says Asuka Watanabe, a sociology professor at Kyoritsu Women's Junior College, who specializes in street fashion.

While it may be in style among fashionable women in New York and London, black isn't an option for hime girls, who prefer pink and florals. They also have a doll-like sense of beauty that requires effort and practice to attain. To create the ideal "supervolume hair," curl only a few strands of hair at a time and alternate between inward and outward curls, advises Vanilla Girl, a fashion magazine for teenagers aspiring to become hime girls. Dyed hair extensions can help form more dynamic ringlets, while mascara applied on top of fake eyelashes plus black liquid eyeliner can really accentuate the eyes.

The princess boom has also taken off among an unlikely group of women: nightclub hostesses who also like the big-hair, glamorous look, though their dresses are often more revealing.

Jesus Diamante started the princess boom. Toyotaka Miyamae, 52, who had run an import shop specializing in evening gowns, set up the company in Osaka seven years ago to design feminine dresses tailored to Japanese women, whom he found to be shorter and to have smaller chests than Western women. Inspired by his favorite actress, Brigitte Bardot, he created dresses in quality fabrics that mimicked the feminine and elegant style of her youth.

"What I wanted to do wasn't that unique," says Mr. Miyamae, who named the company after a Japanese musical. "I just made them to fit Japanese bodies."


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I sincerely doubt that he cares very much

President Bush hasn't even finished his term in office, but some people in the media can't wait to piss on his legacy:

George W. Bush is unlikely to find his name on a lot of buildings and geographical features after he becomes a former U.S. president Jan. 20.

At the moment, the 43rd president has an elementary school and road in Texas and two highways -- one in Ghana and one in the former Soviet republic of Georgia -- named after him, the Austin (Texas) American-Statesman reports.

Forgive me, but haven't we been told by the left and some people in the MSM (but of course, I repeat myself) that we've been living in a fascist, totalitarian state over the last eight years? The kind of place where our "Dear Leader" is honored with statues, streets, buildings, and even cities named in his honor? You know, like in West Virginia?

I'm fairly certain that George W. Bush will wait for the judgment of history, which usually takes quite a while.  But the fact that he doesn't have a bunch of stuff named for him already?  Damning

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November 18, 2008

You've got to be kidding me

Newsweek is reporting that Obama will nominate the guy who helped President Clinton pardon Marc Rich as his Attorney General. 

Hopenchange is more Clintonian than I would have thought.

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November 14, 2008

I can has moor atenshun?

The pregnant "man" is pregnant again

I can't wait to hear what "Red Eye" has to say this go around.  The last time was pretty spectacular.

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November 12, 2008

Where's the Outrage?

Of course, the only proper response to a religious entity interfering in politics is to REVOKE THEIR TAX EXEMPT STATUS!!!!!!1`11111eleventybajillion

Liberal Ideology 503,002,221, Intellectual Consistency 0.

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November 11, 2008

Kathleen Parker just found a new BFF

Norah Vincent calls herself a "libertarian fiscal conservative," and in today's L.A. Times, she writes a column about how she's begun to regret that she didn't vote this year...for Obama:

I have, to my great surprise, found myself moved to tears by the president-elect, by his poise and graciousness, not to mention what seems to be his almost Hegelian historical significance. I now wonder if I missed out on the moment. Am I going to feel a little caught out one day when I have to say that I did not vote for him? Or will I feel vindicated by what will surely be the many and great disappointments of the Obama administration?
She then goes on to briefly discuss some of the possible downsides to trusting "someone, anyone, who can manage to get himself elected in a democracy, and moreover someone who can do it while moving you to tears," Concluding that someone like that "is either P.T. Barnum or Gandhi." And then she returns to polishing his knob:
Maybe he's just an absurdly hopeful person with a lot of energy and belief who can strike the infinitely delicate balance of making the masses happy while sticking to his core beliefs. Maybe he's someone who knows how to tell us what we want to hear while at the same time doing what needs to be done. At this point, it's anybody's guess.

But whatever the case, watching Obama, I can't help myself. I feel proud of us. I think the world is actually proud of us too, and more than a little surprised. It didn't think we had it in us. To tell you the truth, neither did I. We -- well, actually, you -- didn't elect a black man to the presidency. You elected someone who is an incredibly inspiring man, a Kennedyesque, Lincolnesque, Rooseveltesque man, who happens to be black. You elected him not because of or in spite of his race, but without regard to his race, and whether he lives up to even the 100th part of his promise, the electorate has lived up to its, and sitting here now, embarrassedly wiping my eyes, I sort of wish I had been part of it.
Yeah, I just threw up a little bit, too. But that's not the worst of it. No, in listing her reasons why she didn't cast a vote for either candidate, guess what her main reason for opposing McCain was? That's right, a major case of PDS:
Christopher Hitchens was right on the money when he called her a "proud, boastful ignoramus," though I would go further. She is a belligerent ignoramus. The resounding theme of her candidacy was a shamefully rabble-rousing, nauseatingly populist denunciation of knowledge, intellectual expression and reasoned debate, all apparently the vicious province of the media elite and not the hard and hardy backbone of the "real" America.

Watching her made me sick, and the thought of her ascending to the highest office in the land on the possible demise of her less-than-robust 72-year-old boss was not something I could live with. A vote for him was, in all likelihood, a vote for her, and I just couldn't do it.
Sure, Norah. She's just an ignorant, Bible-thumpin' snowbilly who hasn't accomplished a tenth of what you have. Why, I bet she doesn't even get invited to any of the cocktail parties you attend.

I'll bet Sarah Palin doesn't have a book deal like Norah's. She's the author, we're told at the end of her column, of the forthcoming tome "Voluntary Madness: My Year Lost and Found in the Loony Bin."

Perhaps she should have stayed for more than a year, seeing as how she gets all weepy watching speeches from a guy she couldn't even bring herself to vote for.

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November 09, 2008

The heroic statues can't be far behind

Words fail me...

Plans are being made to promote a national holiday for Barack Obama, who will become the nation's 44th president when he takes the oath of office Jan. 20.
I, for one, can't wait to unwrap my Barackmas presents. Obligatory video follows:

(Via the comments here.)

Posted by: Sean M. at 06:59 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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November 07, 2008

Maya channels Michelle

Overrated poet Maya Angelou: "I don't have to apologize for my country when I'm abroad.  I can say, 'I belong to a great country.'"

Underpaid blogger Sean M.: "Who gives a shit about Maya Angelou anymore?"

Posted by: Sean M. at 08:30 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Magnanimous in victory

I don't know if you're familiar with Sorry Everybody, which was a website sore-loser Lefties came up with to promote the fact that they had voted for John Kerry, which would have doubtlessly pleased our Euro betters after the 2004 election.

Some lefty has decided that the same concept (which, in 2004 meant that we should be apologizing to foreigners for our democratic process) should be applied to this election, but with a twist...

That's right. Now that The One is President-Elect, let's put everything aside for the sake of Unity. I suppose we're supposed to forget that everything our  current President has done over the last eight or so years has been characterized as a march toward a police state.  Or are we to emphasize that?  Either way, we get The One soon.

As for the rest of the world...Fuck You. You've earned it. You may be glad that he won it, but you'll be disappointed soon enough.


Update: What he said.

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Is this for real? Really?

I realize that teh Internets are relatively new, but has anything like this ever, ever existed before?  "Office of the President-Elect"?  And it's a .gov domain?  WTF?  Are we actually paying for this shit with taxpayer money when he could be running it on his campaign website?  I mean, "Doodad Pro" and "Nodda Realperson" have deep pockets.

I find the urge to be a bigger man than the Kos Kiddies and DUmmies etc.  have been since January, 2001 slipping away faster and faster...

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November 05, 2008

Just when I was starting to calm down...

Okay, so we lost.  It's sunk in.  It sucks, but hey, life sucks in general, right?  But things are going back to normal, now.  And I was looking forward to watching Jeopardy this evening.

There.  Was.  No.  Jeopardy.

Apparently, ABC, which is the network that runs the show here in SoCal, decided that since this was the most historicalest election EVAR!!!1!elebben!, they needed to run an extra half hour of Charlie Gibson slobbering over Obama's victory.  I wasn't happy when they did that on Monday, but it was still the run-up to the election.  I knew they wouldn't run it last night, seeing as how it was going to be wall-to-wall election coverage on everything but the Food Network.  But tonight?  When it's over and done with?  They're going to rub it in my face and deny me my Trebek fix?

Charlie, don't take this the wrong way, but I hope you, the rest of the team at ABC News, and all of the network's programming executives die in a fire.

Posted by: Sean M. at 10:37 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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And so it begins

Hey, looky, the foreigners loves us again!

I'm a marathon runner, and I have a red, white and blue singlet that I've seldom dared to wear on the Continent. Marathons are difficult enough without enduring catcalls and jeers from spectators.

But my best friend and training partner — who is French — just gave me his stamp of approval.

"Will you wear your Stars and Stripes shirt now? You're allowed!" he told me.

I'd tell you to read the whole thing, but you'd probably throw up a little in your mouth like I did.

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November 03, 2008

"Just Consider It Your Penalty For Voting For Bush."

I recently had a thrilling O-bot in-law, and he used that line one me when I mentioned that The One keeps lowering his line for tax increases to an amount that my family makes.

Just warning, since he is a committed Kossack (I have never told him I write for a blog, or that I read anything beyond Druge, lest I have a sudden influx of target practice opportunities in my front yard). This may be a talking point coming down the pike should The Messiah start raising taxes on anybody and everybody.

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You would think that a song about drinking all night and then eating bacon in the morning (with donuts, too) would be pretty awesome, wouldn't you?  (Just say yes.  It makes this setup easier.)  I mean, how could you possibly lose with a song about booze and the world's best meat?

Why, by adding a bunch of crap about You-Know-Who and his doddering, gaffe-prone Uncle Pluggy.

Ugh.  That's a crime against bacon.  I'm gonna have to murder a whole truckload of hobos before my rage subsides.

Posted by: Sean M. at 02:09 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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