December 17, 2008

The Chinese Really Love Explosions

So, this Wang is at a wake for his relative when half the roof is blown off by a massive explosion.  Authorities assume the house and the Wang were struck by lightning. 

A few days later at the Wang's funeral, as the Wang is being put into the cremation chamber, he explodes spectacularly, blowing the doors off.

Awesome.

Turns out that the house wasn't struck by lightning, but by a weather rocket* which lodged itself inside his body, causing the latter explosion. 

We at DPUD will be watching the news to see if any further people explode at funerals.  This may be the beginning of a chain reaction that kills everyone in China.

* What the fuck is a weather rocket?  I've heard of weather balloons but it seems that balloons are too peaceful and silent and safe for the Chinese.  No, right after they get done spraying lead paint into our toothpaste, they get right to building weather rockets which... I don't know... fucking fly up into the air and um...  blow up the weather?  I'm not really sure.  Do they have hot air rockets where they tie a lead-coated wicker basket to a rocket and enjoy a lazy day screaching across the sky?

(h/t: Alice H.)

Posted by: Moron Pundit at 11:11 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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