June 04, 2010

No. EN-OH. No.

I accept that language is an evolving, complex thing.  Heck, I took some linguistic classes in college.  I'm aware that modern American English is very different from modern British English, which is different from Middle English, which is different from Ye Auld English, which is different from German, which is different from High German, which is different from Low German, and now I'm getting silly.

But I think that's the point.

I'm not a linguist by any stretch of the imagination, but I am a lover of words.  Words like "ever" and "enough" and "ought".  And, while, like any dumbass using the interwebz, I will occassionally use words like, well, interwebz, I also recognize the difference between "ever" and "evah" - as a cultural inflection.

Which is why, to the four dumbasses in DC, I say, "No."

Four peaceful protesters, some dressed in full-length black and yellow bee costumes, represented the American Literacy Council and the London-based Spelling Society and stood outside the Grand Hyatt on Thursday, where the Scripps National Spelling Bee is being held. Their message was short: Simplify the way we spell words.

Roberta Mahoney, 81, a former Fairfax County, Va. elementary school principal, said the current language obstructs 40 percent of the population from learning how to read, write and spell.

"Our alphabet has 425-plus ways of putting words together in illogical ways," Mahoney said.

The protesting cohort distributed pins to willing passers-by with their logo, "Enuf is enuf. Enough is too much."

According to literature distributed by the group, it makes more sense for "fruit" to be spelled as "froot," "slow" should be "slo," and "heifer" — a word spelled correctly during the first oral round of the bee Thursday by Texas competitor Ramesh Ghanta — should be "hefer."

I guess all I have to say to that is - fr srsly?

H/T to my husband's Facechimp page.  I hate it when he beats me to a good story.

Posted by: Ember at 05:28 PM | Comments (25) | Add Comment
Post contains 327 words, total size 2 kb.

1 Christ Almighty.

Posted by: Mandy P. at June 04, 2010 05:56 PM (MK6Kx)

2 Couldn't agree more. I too occasionally use teh intarwebz speek but I don't think it needs to become the law of the land.  /shudder

Hey, maybe spelling bees can be like these lazy asses want once we go full on Idiocracy.

Posted by: Nicole at June 04, 2010 06:15 PM (iUBlB)

3 They can spell words however they want.  The rest of us don't have to actually pay attention to whatever they write using their misspelled words, however.

Posted by: Alice H at June 04, 2010 06:24 PM (qJHYy)

4 fuk this shit.  theez peepel r mor stoopider then aneewon i has evar met.  Spel stuff rite, or dont spel at all.  Stoopid bastards. 

Posted by: Goober at June 04, 2010 06:54 PM (Pzz/u)

5 "Four peaceful protesters, some dressed in full-length black and yellow bee costumes"

At that point, it was exceedingly clear they were fucking dumbasses. 

Dear Roberta Mahoney, 81, former Fairfax County, Va. elementary school principal,

Just because you're old doesn't imply you're smart, fuckstain.  Die all- fucking ready so we can get on with properly educating our children. 

Signed,
Those of us that aren't fucking retarded.

Posted by: tangonine at June 04, 2010 10:05 PM (C8Pcc)

6 I think the worst part of it, tangonine, is that I know people who are clinically retarded who can read and write without having to spell words incorrectly.  So clearly, your letter should be signed, "Those of us that aren't too fucking lazy to learn to do the most basic, important thing for survival in modern society."

Posted by: Ember at June 04, 2010 10:09 PM (LdRAG)

7 I thought about it after I posted it, Ember, and I officially apologize to people that are clinically retarded because they absolutely give more effort than these cockholsters.  I did an injustice by using that term because comparing developmentally challenged people to these  skidmarks on the underwear of education is totally wrong.

Every person I've known who suffers from a learning disorder strives to do exactly what this old fuckbag of unlearning thinks is a waste of time, so, in fact, on behalf of all retarded people (sorry, I'm not up on all the PC terminology): 

Fuck you you old diaper wearing hag!

Posted by: tangonine at June 04, 2010 10:19 PM (C8Pcc)

8 This sort of thing actually goes back to at least the turn of the last century.  George Bernard Shaw spent (or wasted) a lot of time on this, going so far as to suggest during one of the World Wars that the spelling of the word "bomb" be changed to "bom" because it would increase productivity and save resources. 

Yes, really.

Posted by: Sean M. at June 04, 2010 11:19 PM (rLWHv)

9 A similar proposal, from some time back: http://www.mantex.co.uk/2009/10/26/spelling-reform/

Posted by: Red Five at June 05, 2010 09:46 AM (89z8r)

10 In San Francisco, they tried Ebonics in the Black community, but the words and meanings kept changing every year so they finally gave up.  I say keep it strict (English language) and keep out as much slang as possible

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